Thursday, July 31, 2008

Remembering Joey - by Ray

* see comment section for an explanation of who Ray is :)

I ended up with Joeys IPOD while I was in Iraq this spring. While I was there my IPOD, with all my favorite music, broke...yes I tried all the button pushing tricks, but it was fried. I was forced to listen to JJ's IPOD and all these bands and songs I had never/barely even heard of before from JJ's "LA" music catalog...like..Cat Power...the Pixies...Red 5 etc. I started to really like all these bands that, at first, I thought were going to suck...and that I was going to be stuck with for weeks, but I actually really like them now. This is so trivial, but I associate all that music I listened to now with Joey. music was such a big part of who he was...I feel like its a really good way...maybe the best way, to connect with the person I knew him to be.

Since Joey died, the things that have become more prevalent or more in the forefront of my mind is how important people are. It sounds obvious,..but what actually matters..at the end of the day is friends and family and God... making the time together matter. I can't really talk much on that because of all the time I spend away from home in the military, but whatever time we do have...make it count.

We all would love to have another Christmas or summer with Joey, but its not going to happen any time soon unfortunately. What we can do though...what I am going to do is take full advantage of the time we have with each other....with our spouses, kids, loved ones, neighbors and friends.....This life is sooo short. I really want to make it count. losing Joey has really illustrated the importance of that.

Also, It seems like I am noticing all my flaws more than ever....like they are being highlighted so I don't overlook them. I feel like I need to be more generous for some reason? I have been putting more money in those donation boxes at the store , the ones with the sick kids on the front.

I've also been tipping more than normal at restaurants. I don't care as much about money, and making it, as I did before. It seems like a better idea to invest in time with God and the people we care for. Its the times and experiences we have together that are going to matter in the end. Everything else is trivial.


We will miss you Joey, for the rest of our lives here. We Love You.

RAY-

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just in case you may be wondering who Ray is... it's my sweet hubby, Sean, Joey's brother-in-law. Joey and Sean called each other "Ray" or "Killer Ray", an inside joke between the two of them from about 14 years ago that has never died. Maybe Sean will tell that story soon... It's a funny one.

Sean loved Joey like a "blood" brother. Sean is an only child, so Joey has been the closest thing he has ever had to a real brother. A big loss for him, but thank God, a temporary one!

Thanks for posting that, Liza

xoxo- Jo Anne

Anonymous said...

Romans 12: 10(TLB)
"Love each other with brotherly affection and take delight in honoring each other."

Romans 12:10 (KJV)
"Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another."

Anonymous said...

Dear Karen and Joe,

Our family has kept you in our prayers.

We love you,

The Stricklands

Jaimers said...

Killer Ray...beautifuly expressed. I feel similar in the way I feel Joey through music..love you and you are an amazing brother in law to me and looking forward to our next family vacation together even though it will feel emptier without Joey..love you guys,
Jaime

Karen said...

Dear Sean...that was so touching. Thank you so much for writing that. Joey loved you and respected you so much. Thanks for being a fantastic brother to him and for giving us so many laughs between the two of you. We were blessed to have so much warmth and fun as a family. We pray protection and blessing on you Sean. See you soon.
Much love, Karen

Anonymous said...

Dear Sean,
Jackie, Matt, and I had a wonderful time with you at Joey's house before the LA service. You were so kind to us, and though we'd only met a few times, you were quick to embrace us as family. I remember sitting at Joey's cool new (and perhaps controversial?) dining room set, and you looking around and saying something to the effect of " Wow, more family pops up all the time around here." It's the strange thing about family. One second you don't know them, the next you love them forever. You have a fine young family, son. And there are several new family members coming your way in the future, through those little olive branches of yours. Jamie and Drew, the same holds true for you, I'm just too old to write this twice. As you come farther through this time, God will get the train back on track, and life will start moving again. How excited you must be for God's future blessings! The one thing I think we all can agree on is that we all have honored God in this last few months. We have weathered this storm together, and I think we are all changed forever because of it. But we honorably, yet reluctantly, have done what God has led us all to do. Let's continue on, now. Our prayers and love are with you all. Uncle Steve

Anonymous said...

Sean: I am always touched and moved by your sharing..it is so much from the heart. Your love for Joey and family shines through each time. You have grown into such a wonderful man, husband, father and friend. It is a such a joy to be around you.

Thank you - I continue to pray for you each morning.

Love - "Annie Viv"