Remembering Joey ...

Joseph

2009-10-22T00:51:00.000-07:00

"In the end everything will be all right, nothing can harm you permanently; no loss is lasting, no defeat more than transitory, no disappointment is conclusive. Suffering, failure, loneliness, sorrow, discouragement and death will be part of your journey, but the kingdom of God will conquer all of these horrors. No evil can resist grace forever."

-Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

Happy Birthday Papa Joe!

2009-10-10T05:00:00.000-07:00

Could these two be singing Happy Birthday to you on this photo? They are now ...

Happy Birthday Papa Joe
Happy Birthday Papa Joe
Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday Papa Joe!

Happy Birthday Joey!

2009-08-16T08:32:00.000-07:00

Now in heaven...

Wondering if birthdays are celebrated there.

Maybe not.

Tough times for the loved ones left behind

Rough moments

Indescribable feelings

Unfathomable emotions

Should they cry

should they laugh

Should they celebrate

or not?

Ah, birthdays after death

such an irony!

Death comes after birth

But we don't want it too soon

Ah love, what great joy and sorrow you bring

Faith, great expectations within

Cry, no room for words

Tears, flow like a river

Sob, cry in quietness

Smile, even though the heart is breaking

Numb, emotions gone

Grace, that will give then strength

Ah, birthdays after death

You are not fun.

2009-06-11T08:03:00.001-07:00

The Brief Journey Of Life

2009-05-22T01:36:00.000-07:00

Our days on earth are like a shadow

I Chronicles 29:15 NIV

He who "lives forever" has placed himself at the head of a band of pilgrims who mutter, "How long O Lord, how long?" (Psalm 89:46 NIV)

How long must I endure this sickness?

How long must I endure this spouse?

How long must I endure this paycheck?

Do you really want God to answer? He could, you know. He could answer in terms of the here and now with time increments we know. "Two more years on the illness". "The rest of your life in the marriage". "Ten more years for the bills"

But he seldom does that. He usually opts to measure the here and the now against the there and then; And when you compare this life to that life, this life ain't long.

- Max Lucado

In the Eye of the Storm

* This is the May 22 devotion on the "Grace For The Moment" devotional book that Cassie K gave me last Christmas. How fitting... how timely... must be from the Lord. - Liza

Better Is One Day

2009-05-14T21:50:00.001-07:00

How lovely is your dwelling place, oh, Lord almighty
For my soul longs and even faints for you
Lord, here my heart is satisfied within your presence
I sing beneath the shadow of your wings

(Chorus)
Better is one day in your court, better is one day in your house
Better is one day in your court than thousands elsewhere
{Repeat}

One thing I ask and I would seek, to see your beauty
To find you in the place your glory dwells
One thing I ask and I would seek, to see your beauty
To find you in the place your glory dwells

(Chorus 2x)

My heart and flesh cry out for you the living God
Your spirit's water to my soul
I've tasted and I've seen, come once again to me
I will draw near to you, I will draw near to you

(Chorus 2x)

I Have Engraved You In The Palm Of My Hands

2009-05-09T00:50:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 49

14 But Zion said, "The LORD has forsaken me,

the Lord has forgotten me."

15 "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast

and have no compassion on the child she has borne?

Though she may forget,

I will not forget you!

16 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;

your walls are ever before me.

***

About a year ago, Karen probably would never have thought she would be getting a tattoo. Perhaps, not even in her wildest dreams. And yet, here she is now with a tattoo in her arm as a sign of her never ending love and remembrance of her beloved son, Joey.

I find it very very interesting and comforting that there is a Bible verse that talks about us being engraved in God's palm. What a symbol of unending love and devotion. Thank you God. Thank you.

A blessed Mother's Day to you Karen. I know it's not an easy day to go through, but remember that as Joey's name is engraved in your arm, your name is engraved in our Father's palm. He knows your sorrow. He sees your tears. He is bearing your pain. He will sustain you. And joy will come in the morning. Hang in there.

Psalm 23

2009-04-12T05:20:00.000-07:00

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 He restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, [a] I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Facing Your Sorrow

2009-03-28T03:01:00.001-07:00

I love this photo of Bailey taken during their Ho'olaulea at Kamalii. But for the longest time I avoided looking a the Ho'olaulea photos we had taken....

Avoidance. That's is the defense mechanism I use the most. I do not "deny" painful things and situations, but I do tend to go around it when I know it will inflict pain. Same with conflicts. I do not "project" nor "blame" others, but I avoid it at all costs.

So why was I avoiding this photo? Because on the day we were celebrating the Ho'olaulea, Joey passed away. We didn't know he was gone at the time we are watching this beautiful event (us and the Johnsons, Borlands, Englerts, Knowles, etc.). But he was.

See what I mean? This photo is special but I was afraid to show it to Karen and Joe because I was afraid it will bring them sorrow. I was afraid it will be a sad reminder.

And yet this past weekend (on Joey's 10th month anniversary of going to heaven) I was reminded by the Holy Spirit that there's nothing to be sad about this photo. At the time the kids were celebrating Ho'olaulea, Joey is already is heaven, and probably was watching it with us. He was not alone in his room waiting to be found. His old body was there but his spirit is in heaven, the moment he was "called" home.

And so I decided to post this photo here today. To actually face the sorrow, not go around it. For in facing the sorrow comes healing.

Joe & Karen, JoAnne and Jaime, Rachel, and many others are still grieving. Who knows how long that will last. I bet until they meet Joey again in heaven. Oh they are probably not crying everyday anymore (maybe they are); and yes they are now smiling often and even laughing out loud. But deep inside, there still is sorrow. I am just thankful they are not running away from it, but facing it ... facing it with the help of God, drawing strength from Him each and every moment.

I am thankful that the Johnsons have openly shared some of their deepest sorrows with us. The least we can do (but is very important) is to continue to lift them up in prayers.

Today, (Saturday, 12noon until 3+PM), we are going to gather at Hope Chapel and say our "goodbyes - till we meet again" to Joe and Karen. They are moving to Virginia on the first week of April to be with their families there. The "avoidant me" had avoided getting involved with the preparation of this gathering because I wasn't ready to say goodbye. But today, I guess I am "facing my sadness" knowing that God has a purpose and a plan.

When you pass through the water, I will be with you; in the rivers you shall not drown. When you walk through fire, you shall not be burned; the flames shall not consume you. Isaiah 43:2

Liza's Eyeview

How We Are Doing Now

2009-02-15T03:35:00.000-08:00

We got back to Maui on Monday. It seems all green and blue technicolor after being in wintry gray Virginia for the past 10 weeks. Despite the gloomy skies of the east coast, the warmth of our family circle got us through our first Christmas without Joey and into a new year. We needed each other like a chilled person needs to be wrapped in a thick blanket. We didn't do much, but were comforted by the little things: meals together, our grandchildren's "performances", walks in the woods, and the silly antics of the three dogs, Rommel, Maggie and MJ.

Being back on Maui is like returning to an empty house. It's beautiful but lonely for us. Not that our Maui friends don't care, because they do. The problem is simply that we have so many memories here and painful reminders of a life that will never be again. The waves he surfed, the porch he stored his board on, the lanai we ate breakfast on, the bed he slept in....we see Joey everywhere, but he's not here, and it aches all the time.

The relentless ache of grief can't be easily soothed. Nothing makes it go away completely. It's always there now, like a burdensome relative who's moved into the house to stay. A few things quiet it momentarily and we give ourselves breaks with those things as much as we can. Anything funny is really helpful, so I've gotten into the habit of watching old episodes of funny shows on my dvd player, just so I won't sink into sadness. Who knew Seinfeld and the Office would be such great therapy?

We still don't do much. I come up with all kinds of ideas of things I could do or should do, and before losing Joey, WOULD do, but now I don't follow thru on many of them. No energy for anything extra. I hope all the time that people will understand when I don't call, don't show up, don't go out, don't move off the couch, don't laugh, and don't want to talk about it. Sometimes it is necessary to keep myself in a suspended state of animation, then I don't feel and don't have to think about what I lost. I just keep the pain at bay for a little while.

What we lost? Too much to say, but a short list reads like this: a best friend to each of us, tall hugs from a man (not my husband) who adored me, a tower of strength, a fount of love, a scrabble partner, a comedian, an interested and inquisitive conversationalist, an inspiring motivator, an adventurer, a cool and informed cultural guide, a future daughter-in-law and grandchildren, someone who would laugh at adversity, and smile at everyone else. He made our world safer, kinder and funnier. Now we all have to do life without his wisdom and humor to soften the blows and inspire us up and over the walls.

Can we do it? Yes, we always knew from the first night that we could do it. We knew God would give us the strength to bear our loss and that there was ultimate hope. We just didn't want to have to do it. And it hurts more than we ever imagined that first night, when denial protected us and we didn't yet know what it meant to not have Joey in our world.

So the next obvious step is to move back to Virginia and be with our warm blanket all the time. Home IS where the heart is. We are trying to buy a 7-acre farm in Virginia. Don't ask us why, we really don't know the answer. Probably something having to do with being a fun place for our grandchildren. It just fits us right now for some inexplicable reason. So we will be saying a sad goodbye to Maui and the people we have loved and suffered with, and in April, with God's help, we will be moving on to grayer pastures.

In closing, I would like to share this verse from Psalm 23 that the Lord reminded me of when we found the farm:

Psalm 23
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in GREEN PASTURES.
He leads me beside STILL WATERS.
He restores my soul.

I'm trusting that this place of green pastures and still waters will help to restore our souls.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers. We love and appreciate you all.

Your faithful friends,
Joe and Karen

Aunt Viv's Dream of Joey

2009-02-04T06:42:00.000-08:00

* this was taken from Autie Viv's post on Remembering Joey at Facebook:

I had a dream about Joey a week ago Saturday. My son Jeff and I were working on my mother's 1893 house which we are putting up for sale...empty - and for those of you who know me....some not so fun times and thoughts from this house. '

Jeff and I decided to sleep on aero beds in the house that night and use the old air conditioning unit in the window (we both can't sleep without fans) ....passed on from mother to daughter to son...anyway.

I woke up in the middle of the night and heard this whispering voices - I asked my son if he heard them, but he was half asleep and said no...I heard them again and started to get scared...demons in the house! I prayed that over the house and myself and Jeff and in the name of Jesus prayed for them to be gone and threw the covers over my head!!! I fell asleep.

All of a sudden - Joey came rushing in the front door telling me what a great job I was doing on Grandma's house...how great a house it was...how safe a house it was. He said, "Let's go and look at all the rooms together"...he was laughing and running around like a little elf - although he was probably 24-25, but laughed like a young boy. He ran into each one of the rooms - just out of my reach as I asked him to wait for me....he just laughed and turned to me...like come on follow me, this is great! He reached the stairs and turned around and smiled - "this is a great house". So we went through each one of the rooms in the house and then he just walked through the back door upstairs and walked away. I woke up and was thinking WOW - I feel so safe and comforted. Joey loved his grandma and her big old house and he knew that it was a safe place to be...and he wanted me to know that too.

Joy

2009-01-26T09:45:00.000-08:00

Weeping may endure for a night ... but joy comes in the morning - Psalm ___

Happy Birthday Karen

2009-01-22T06:50:00.000-08:00

If Joey's here, what would Joey do for Karen on her birthday? I think he would sing this song to her:

Happy Birthday Karen!

Happy Birthday ... Tell Me How ...

2009-01-21T07:18:00.000-08:00

Karen's birthday is tomorrow, January 22.

Joey went to heaven on May 22.

Yes, it's been 8 months.

Can anyone tell me how to best greet Karen for her birthday? Happy birthday is the usual way, right? But darn it, I know no matter how she tries, tomorrow will be a sad day. A sad day because no matter how much she prays, the fact is she will never get a phone call from her darling son to greet her "happy birthday"!

I am just sayin' ....

No, really ... I am in the mood to rant today. Sure, we all know Joey is in a better place. And sure we all know that as Christians we are all supposed to rejoice. But darn it, I am a mom and I know how mom feels when she misses her son. Darn it, I am mad and I am sad!

I will be back for a more calm post. But this morning I think a rant is better. God is not afraid to hear what we really feel (he knows it anyway). And right now I feel sad that Joey was not able to call her sister Joanne to greet her a happy birthday, and Joey will not be calling Karen tomorrow to greet her a Happy Birthday.

Can anyone tell me how to handle this kind of situation? Rejoice? Celebrate? Oh that's easy for us to say. The fact is it stinks! It's a pit to celebrate your "first birthday after one of your loved ones passed away". That's the truth. That's the plain truth.

And so I think a rant is ok. Maybe a scream would be better. And then after that ... after that I will call upon the Holy Spirit to pour out His mighty comfort, and once again affirm that God is in control. That God has plan. That His ways are higher than our ways. And that we may never understand here on earth why the heck Joey was called to heaven earlier than Karen and Joe. But the Holy Spirit will bring comfort. He will even bring joy. And He will sustain. He will carry them through.

Well ... Karen, Happy Birthday. I am giving you the permission to scream and to cry. Go ahead.

But at the end of the day, know that God is giving you an extra dose of comfort today and tomorrow because He knows you'll need it. And because Joey is there in heaven, with Jesus, asking God, saying "take good care of my mama, because I love her".

Our Heavenly Dwelling

2009-01-19T01:10:00.000-08:00

2 Corinthians 5:1-10

1Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. 2Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, 3because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. 4For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. 5Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

6Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. 7We live by faith, not by sight. 8We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. 9So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. 10For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.

Joe Smilin' At You

2009-01-16T02:24:00.001-08:00

I like this photo of Joey with the kids. You can see pure joy in his smile. And each kid has a unique expression on their faces :)

Joseph's Pic Of The Day - Fire

2009-01-10T10:20:00.000-08:00

I love the "pyro-look in the eyes...Mischievious but fun-loving.... Joe and i spent many hours in the discipleship of over-the top fires.....Everytime I stoke up a big fire in the Virginia Beach cold I think of Joseph aned his love of stoking a big hot fire......Kevin sure looks happy and warm!

I sure miss you Mijo!
Pops

Featured on Travelblog.com

2009-01-08T07:27:00.000-08:00

Joe(y) and Rachel's blog VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER is featured on Travelblog.com. CHECK IT OUT HERE! and leave a comment there if you can :)

Remembering Joey (on Facebook)

2009-01-04T04:20:00.000-08:00

I thought I'd mention it here, in case some of you didn't know yet. You can go there and join the group. It's started by Rachel and she's maintaining it along with the Johnsons. Here's the basic info on the group:

Joseph, Joey, Joe - the fiery redheaded kid who became the man we all admired and loved.

His passion for life shone through in everything he put himself into - music, surfing, snowboarding, travel, work, friends, love, politics, beer brewing - by nature he was a true connoisseur. He was quick to give you his opinion, then even quicker to back it up with an intelligent, expressive reason. He loved to laugh, inspire laughter, make up songs, dance, and run jokes into the ground a hundred times over.

He was a true liver of life (that one's for you, JR).

The pain of his abrupt passing is deepened by the thought of his memory fading. Please freely share stories, photos, memories - anything to keep him with us. (click here)

Christmas Letter From Karen and Joe

2008-12-22T23:33:00.000-08:00

The following letter was originally written by Karen on December 17. We held of on posting it for reasons hard to explain (maybe might be too sad for some...). But after reading Sharon's words from Treasures In Darkness remembering her son Mark , Marybeth's Christmas Letter remembering Maria, and the Laurie's Christmas card this remembering their son Christopher - I know we have to post this letter, remembering Joey. This is not the usual "merry" Christmas letter, but it's a Christmas letter from their heart. Here it is:

We ordered Christmas cards with a family picture on them, but they came back from Shutterfly so dark and difficult to see that we had to return them. So this post comes instead. The Christmas card disappointment is a metaphor for our lives these days. Nothing has turned out the way we wanted it to, and we wish we could just send the whole mess back to the manufacturer. Our 2008 is a sad series of shock waves, setbacks and sleepless nights. One disappointment tipped another, till we were left with a heap of loss. And like the Christmas card whose image is bearly discernible, we also have had difficulty seeing in the dark. We have asked "why" a thousand times, and shed ten thousand tears. In our worst moments, it feels as if our hearts and our dreams have been shattered and scattered to the wind. We breathe each day, and do the essentials, and that is all we have in us to do for now.

But in the midst of all this sadness, there has been comfort, and that is what has sustained us. So for the rest of our Christmas letter, we want to tell you about the mercy we have experienced in our darkest hour. For God is near to the broken-hearted, and we have felt that deeply and in so many ways.

Mercy 1: Our son was/is a beautiful person. We were proud of him in life and in death. He loved, he lived and he lead with passion. He touched so many with his goodness. He displayed love, acceptance, generosity, compassion, wisdom, adventure and good humor. His life was a success by every measurement. We have no regrets about our relationship with him, or our investment in him.

Mercy 2: Our son was ready for Heaven. He believed in Christ for the forgiveness of his sins and trusted in God to take care of him no matter what. He died with his daily reading Bible by his side. His faith in Christ provided him the only ticket he needed to get into Heaven. He didn't have to earn his way to Heaven, he just had to believe there was One who had done it for him, which he unashamedly did.

Mercy 3: Heaven is real. We never paid much attention to Heaven before, we just took it for granted as the place old or sick people go when they die. From the moment Joey passed, it became topic one. We had to seek out the scriptures that told us about Heaven or we would never have found any comfort in his passing. Now it is as real to us as Kihei or Virginia Beach. Though we haven't seen it, we think about it every day, and imagine what Joey is experiencing. The veil between Heaven and earth seems thinner now. Bible verses about Heaven have become gold to us, our earthly hope for ultimate reunion. We want to make him proud by the way we walk in faith, hearing him whisper to us, "It's real, it's awesome; don't doubt, just trust God and live for Him!".

Mercy 4: A final goodbye together as a family. The months before Joey passed afforded us more than the usual number of get-togethers with his sisters, who saw him a couple of times on trips to California. We also had a wonderful Christmas with him skiing last year in Idaho. The week before Joey passed, we were all in Hawaii together for his sister JoAnne's graduation. In addition, his best friend and Second Family were also there, as their son graduated too. Joey was so happy to be with us all, and even more tender than usual with us. We had meaningful talks and lots of laughs. We sat on the beach and we surfed. He regaled his nieces and nephews with stories that entertained us all. He treated his mom to High Tea at the Moana Surfrider Hotel! We ate fish tacos and drank beer together! We had a memorable dinner with his best friend at Mama's Fish House! A splendid week. How do you account for such timing except to know that God was preparing the way for us.

Mercy 5: Rachel and her pictures. Rachel is God's gift to our family. The most amazing, talented, insightful, lovely woman you could ever hope to marry your son. Though we never made it to the wedding, she is our daughter-in-love, a special friend to each one of us. Her pictures of our son and his last three years capture the essence of his spirit and are the treasures we live on daily. Rachel's love for Joey and loyalty to us is like Ruth's in the Bible--where you go, I will go, your people will be my people, your God will be my God. There aren't enough words for the depth and beauty of Rachel or the comfort she has given us.

Mercy 6: Our daughters and son-in-laws and grandchildren. Our daughters adore their brother. They aren't jealous of our love for him, they share it and we have been able to weep together over and over again for what we lost when he went to Heaven. Their patience with our paralysis has been most helpful. Our son-in-laws love Joey, too, and have shown amazing strength in a year where they also lost so many of their Navy SEAL teammates. When time stopped, they have kept us moving forward. Our grandchildren continue to give us joy and laughter when we couldn't find it anywhere else. Everyone in our family has endured the loss of Joey with courage and faith. And even though grief is an isolating experience, they have worked hard to keep us united and have really risen to the need.

Mercy 7: Our family and friends to catch us when we fell. There are simply too many wonderful people to mention here by name, but they have been like soft pillows cushioning us when we crashed against the rocks. Just a short list includes: Joey's friends who went to his house and found him, who called us, who provided housing for our family and meals, friends who gathered in our home in Maui and made our travel arrangements, friends who drove and picked us up and met us at the mortuary, our California friends who handled every detail of the memorial services, and our Maui friends who did the same, friends who brought us meals, friends who have continually comforted us with their words, thoughtful gifts, books, stories, pictures and blog posts. We would not be standing had it not been for the people around us who carried and continue to carry us. We needed every single one of you and still do, and thank you from the depths of our hearts.

This is just a portion of the ways that God has taken care of us. We give Him thanks for all His faithfulness. We continue to gather mercies, and believe that God will continue to provide them for us in the years to come. The verse that we hang on to in this new chapter of our lives is this one from Philippians 3:20:

Our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables Him to bring everything under His control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.

Your faithful friends,
Joe and Karen

Changing Traditions

2008-12-22T08:58:00.000-08:00

We felt loved by the friends who prepared and served the Christmas Eve buffet in our home before the communion service. In his Christmas Eve message Chuck shared with the congregation the Scriptures from Isaiah that were so comforting to us. By the time we sang “O Holy Night” at the end of the service, we were emotionally spent and drew strength from the hugs and tears of friends.

By Christmas morning we needed private family time. Instead of joining extended family for the traditional noisy celebration at the homes of our parents, we stayed at our house. Phone calls from family members meant so much as we tried to honor Christ and grieve for Mark at the same time.

The Treasure of Holiday Presence

(Jesus said,) “I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” (Matt. 28:20)

On Christmas day, I slipped away to spend time alone in our bedroom, reading the Christmas story meditating especially on Mary and the conflicting emotions she must have experienced from the moment the angel told her about the coming Messiah. I wondered, Was she lonely, afraid, confused? What emotions swirled around her soul when she gave birth to Jesus, far from family, disconnected from everything familiar? I felt strangely drawn to her heart and the feelings she may have experienced on the dark, lonely night.

Mary’s song, recorded in Luke 1:46-55, acknowledged her own need of a Savior and her absolute trust that God keeps his promises from generation to generation. I wondered if she sang this song as a sacrifice of praise, choosing to believe the promises of God in the context of u unbelievable circumstance. I followed the thread of her story to the foot of the cross and wept as I married my longing for Mark to her anguish as she watched the brutalization of her beloved son. Did she wonder where God Was? As if to answer my questions, God drew me back to the Scriptures from Isaiah where he repeatedly promised to never leave me alone, to guide me in the darkness, to never forget me, to always be with me. I remembered that Isaiah prophesied the virgin birth of Jesus and proclaimed that he would be called Immanuel, which means “God with us.” The gospel of Matthew places this prophecy in the middle of the Christmas narrative (Matt. 1:23).

And do you know how Matthew ends his gospel? By his resurrection, Jesus has proven himself a victor over death. He’s about to ascend to the right hand of hi Father in heaven, and he promises his disciples- and his followers for generations to come- that he is not really leaving them. Jesus’ last words: “Surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Jesus, through his Spirit, is here. With us. With you. With me. Even now. Especially now, in the season that celebrates his birth.

Treasures of Hope

Scriptural Gems:

“ ’I am the lord’s servant,” Mary answered. ‘May it be to me as you have said.’“ (Luke 1:38)

“Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” (Luke 2:19)

****

Note from Liza: The last 4 entries on this blog are excerpts from the book titled "Treasures In Darkness - A Grieving Mother Shares Her Heart" written by Sharon W. Betters. If you missed the other 3 entries, click here and all the 4 posts will come up.

Tomorrow I will be posting the Christmas Letter Karen wrote ...

Safe Place of Comfort

2008-12-21T06:35:00.000-08:00

December 23. We’re following the advice of those who have walked this pathway before us, and we’re changing our traditions. When friends realized I did not have the energy or desire to prepare a Christmas Eve buffet, they asked if they could prepare and serve all the food so that we could still gather together on such and important night. I am looking forward to being with the larger group tomorrow evening, but a dinner tonight will be my private gift to my family.

Lord, in answer to my plea to help me experience the joy of Christmas your way, you opened my eyes to treasures I can give to each one of my precious children and husband – the pictures, the story Sean wrote, the birthday letter Mark wrote to Chuck. You are leading me to sue some traditions to create a safe place of comfort and to feely let go of other traditions without fear. Today I wept as I prepared all of Mark’s favorite foods but smiled through tears as I remembered him coming in the back door, stretching his long arms to hang on the entry to the kitchen, and grinning with anticipation of eating hot Syrian bread, dripping with butter. I wished I could see him digging into the stuffed grape leaves one more time. Then I chose to imagine Mark at the banquet table in heaven with you. So, Lord, I’m preparing a special Christmas dinner with all of Mark’s favorite foods, and we’ll think of him enjoying the bounty of your grace while we enjoy the bounty of our Christmas table.

We had read that the anticipation of a holiday, anniversary, or birthday was often worse than the actual event, so one purpose of our family dinner was to create new traditions before Christmas day, hoping to ease in to the pain of Christmas. But my family didn’t know that I had planned a few small surprised for each of them. After dinner chuck asked the kids to join us in the family room in front of our glowing fireplace. I explained that our friend had written a story about our family and that I wanted to share it with them. We laughed and cried together as Sean’s words poignantly and sometimes comically described our family experiencing the second coming of Christ during a future Christmas season.

After the story I gave each of the kids framed pictures of Mark, each one captured a treasured memory with his siblings. I gave Chuck a plaque with the words, “Thanks, Dad, for always being there.” And then I gave him the priceless gift of Mark’s letter that I had found buried in my memories drawer.

Tears streamed down Chuck’s cheeks as he read the framed words:

Dad,

In all the years that you have been my father there has not been a time when you failed to come through for me. There has not been a time when you failed to encourage me. You have always seen through me and my secretive ways and have not failed to counsel me when I need it most. The words “You’re wrong and I’m right” are the words that I hate to hear the most but I thank you for them. You are a dad that many kids only dream of having, and I look up to you for all the knowledge that God has given you. I am proud to be called the “pastor’s kid,” because I believe it is worth dealing with all of the expectations that many people put on me. I thank God for you and the family he has given me each day. Any question that I ask you, you have never failed to answer it. Any problem that I bring to you, you never failed to help me through it. You have made sure that I am always happy and have never left me disappointed. Having you as my father is one for the best things God has given me. If I could repay you, I would, but I know that that is impossible. However, I can afford to tell you that I love you, and that I care about you very much.

Love,
Mark

December 24, Well, Lord, here I am. Christmas Eve. Running until I drop. Trying not to think. But I feel this might be the most important Christmas of my life. Mark’s first Christmas in heaven. Our first Christmas without our child.

***
Note from Liza: The last 3 entries on this blog are excerpts from the book titled "Treasures In Darkness - A Grieving Mother Shares Her Heart" written by Sharon W. Betters. I bought this book for Karen about 2 months ago and somehow I did not get a chance to give it to her. I know now why. I believe God wanted this book to be with me so that I can post these words of encouragement here on the blog for them on Christmastime. Had she gotten this book, I would not have had the words to put on this blog for this season. I believe God wanted to comfort Karen and Joe through this book. If you missed the other 2 entries, click here and all the 3 posts will come up. Aloha.

Decoration-Day Meltdown

2008-12-19T19:42:00.000-08:00

Continuation of the book excerpt (part 1 here)

As the world around me laughed and anticipated a joyous Christmas filed with packages and food and family, I wished we could skip from Thanksgiving to the middle of January. I pleaded with God that he direct my steps through this quagmire of sorrow. I listened carefully as Chuck described the first Christmas as a season wrapped in pain, not fancy paper and bows. Blood and death covered that holy season. Eternal life could not come without such anguish.

December 20, 1993. I’m coming apart and I don’t want to. The weekend went remarkably well. I felt almost strange. Mark seemed to be close by. After the wonderful choir cantata, Sean Delaney sheepishly pulled me aside and said, “I don’t want to intrude on your family, but your sister told me to give you this. I’m not sure hwy, but I think it’s a Christmas gift from God for your family.” He handed me a short manuscript, which I tucked into my bag as our family left for a local restaurant. We talked about Mark and laughed teeter tottering between hysteria and calm.

The Christmas story and Chuck’s message overwhelmed me with a new understanding of who you are and what you did at Christmas. I’m trying to focus on the choice Jesus made to be a suffering servant and that what he is asking of us is not more than he himself has done. But the ghost of grief is stalking me every minute, and I am weak in my own strength. I have so much I want to do for my family. I will not let the enemy use Mark’s death to rob us of Christmas. But I don’t know where to begin.

Psalm 86: Give me an undivided heart - where I will not be forever torn between missing Mark and trusting you. Deliver me from the pain of the grave. I have asked you to give me a sign of your goodness, that others will see your glory and come to you. I think Sean’s story is one of those signs.

Christmas was on a Saturday that year. I was almost proud of the emotional control I had – focusing on Christ and the first Christmas – until Wednesday, when it was time to think about decorating the tree. I didn’t think decorating would be a problem. But as I approached the attic, I started to cry. With each box I moved to get tot eh decorations, I cried harder. I found one of the boys’ Star Wars men, and I cried. And then I found the decorations. ON top was Mark’s stocking. When I saw it, I laid my head down on the box and sobbed. Lord, why?

December 22. Chuck told me we don’t need to do this – decorate. But I said, “Yes, we do. I want to recognize Christmas. We dishonor our son if we don’t recognize his Savior’s birth. We have to lean into the pain.” Chuck pulled me down beside him on the sofa and said, “Then just sit here and cry for a while: don’t try to hold it in.” Finally, as he and young Chuck got the tree ready, I sorted through the decorations. I put most of them back. The stocking won’t go even when he found Mark’s picture. This is all surreal. But we’re getting through.

(to be continued)

The Spirit of Christmas Present

2008-12-18T12:06:00.000-08:00

Below is an excerpt from a book that I bought for Karen. It was written by a mother who was grieving the sudden death of their young adult son, much like the story of Joey. She took some of her journal entries and shared it on the book. The she added some more insights. Details of the book will come later, but for now I wanted Karen and Joe to see this:

The Treasure of Holiday Presence Midnight Principle: The Christmas story itself can give strength through the season.
Journal Insight Sunday, December 19, 1993.

Chuck’s message gives me permission to step back from the glitz of Christmas without guilt. For Some reason it helps me to know that the coming of Messiah was a time of pain and weeping. Jesus did not come as a conquering king but a suffering servant. The shepherds were watching over temple sheep that were set apart for slaughter as sacrifices. God chose for Jesus to be born into the rule of a cruel, brutal man. Herod had killed every member of his family that he suspected of disloyalty. The arrival of the wise men from Iran and Iraq terrified Herod. He was so frightened by their search for the baby who would be king that he ordered every baby boy under the age of two to be killed.Matthew 2:17 -18: “Then what was said through the prophet Jeremiah was fulfilled: ‘A voice is heard in Ramah, weeping and great mourning. Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because they are no more.’ “This terrible loss was prophesied in Jeremiah 31:15. O God, you knew. You knew. Somehow that comforts me. There are no accidents. Mary, the mother of Jesus, is told that a sword will pierce her soul as a result of the birth and life of this child. O God, what did Christmas really cost?

In the Bleak of Midwinter

Isaiah’s Sustenance

Holidays sharpen grief. Celebrating such a treasured family holiday was on our minds even on that terrible July night when we lost Mark. On our way home form the hospital, Chuck grabbed my hand a barely whispered, “Christmas, how can we ever celebrate Christmas?

I had no answer.

Christmas had always been my favorite time of year. We didn’t buy many toys for our children throughout the year; that was reserved for Christmas. What great fun we always had, planning and preparing, watching for sales, loving the adrenalin of the chase and the victory of finding just the right gift at just the right price. When mark and Daniel had wanted the most popular toy, we had done everything we could to find it. We had perpetuated our childhood family traditions; family and friends always joined us for a Christmas Eve buffet and then attended the church communion service. I always loved the candlelight service, the music, the family feeling, the preaching, the security of old family traditions. Afterwards our immediate family had gathered at our home for the kids to exchange gifts and enjoy the euphoria of Christmas.

On the night of Mark’s death, I concluded I would never experience such joy again.

In my journal I wrote out passages from Isaiah as God’s personal Christmas card to me and to remind me of his instructions. Some of those verses are here; some are in the Scriptural Gems section later in the chapter.

But now, this is what the lord says – he who created you, O Jacob He who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you: I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” (Isa. 43:1-2)

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” (Isa. 43:18-19)

“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” (Isa. 49:23b)

***
Part 2 coming soon - titled Decoration-Day Meltdown
P.S. Thank you Eydis for typing these for us ...

Trading My Sorrows

2008-12-16T10:35:00.000-08:00

Holidays are always hard for those who are grieving. The celebration all around simply intensifies the longing of a loved one who are now in heaven. I am sure the Johnsons are experiencing this on this season.

I posted a song for Karen the other day. Today, I have one for Joe. Joe, grab your guitar and sing along with this video. My guess is Joey would be singing this with you - you on earth, he is heaven. Got your guitar? Press the arrow and jam!

One more song HERE - with lyrics and chords.

Ice

2008-12-13T23:27:00.001-08:00

Ice … I always think of Joey when I’m getting ice at work. Work has this massive, over sized ice machine. I don’t know why we have it. It makes like 600 lbs a day and we don’t even use ice at work… just in our drinks at lunch. I usually get asked to bring a cooler (or 2, 3, 4,…) of ice whenever I go to a pot luck or some sort of event. It’s cheap and it’s good to use the ice – keeps it fresh. I’m a pretty social guy so the request to get ice happen a frequently. To be honest, it’s a pain to get ice. It’s always after hours. Everything is locked up. It’s a pain to haul the coolers – you end up sweating like a pig. I usually try to get somebody to help – you know; many hands make the load light. Most people will begrudgingly come along to help carry the end of a cooler, but it’s hard to get help. People will stand and watch me scoop out the ice. If I happen to miss the cooler with a few cubes, most people (all) will just ignore it. Hey, it’s not their work place, right? Most (all) of the time I just kicked the cubes to the side of the room underneath a table – it’ll evaporate by the time someone comes by, right? Well, not Joey. He would always pick up those cubes and toss them in the sink. Get a paper towel and wipe the floor. He just did it as a matter of fact, not for show or in your face sort of way. Joey’s actions spoke to me about the degree of character that he possessed… that he would pick up after me at my place of work… his care /concern for my reputation. Men like Joey a so very few and far between. I am honored to have had time with him, and blessed by his friendship. I still bring ice to events but I pick up the cubes myself, remembering Joey as I do. Miss you, bro.

Bradley

Title Can't Tell Stories ...

2008-12-08T21:51:00.000-08:00

Click the photo and it'll take you to the article at Autofeinds

Mary Did You Know?

2008-12-07T08:57:00.000-08:00

Posting this for Karen.... Mary, the mother of Jesus also felt the pain she is experiencing while grieving ... but ... it did not stop there. Jesus resurrected from the dead, that all of us who believe on Him can have an everlasting life. And because of that, we will one day see Joey again... no more pain, no more sorrows .. in heaven there is everlasting joy!

A Walk In The Woods

2008-12-02T01:31:00.000-08:00

Virginia is cold now, blustery, leafy, refrigerator cold. We wear layers of warmth around our heads and shoulders, We wear boots and mittens, and walk briskly to generate more warmth. It smells wonderful outdoors--woodsy, crisp and golden. We walk through the trees, the muffled sound of leaves shuffling under our feet. The dogs celebrate and romp and investigate and run. Cranky children begin to smile and laugh. We walk in pairs and we walk in lines. We point out the black water of the creek, the gnarly twisted tree trunk, the ruts and ridges of the landscape. We walk till we are tired and full of fresh air.

Back inside, the fires are dancing and we drink hot chocolate and spicy tea. We watch out the windows as the squirrels hop busily, branch to branch, very intent at their gathering task. The harder they work, the less we do. We sit and listen, we chat and play games. We work on puzzles and dinner recipes. Nothing much. We thank God for the soul quietness that only comes from being outdoors.

Country Roads, Take Me Home ...

2008-11-28T10:03:00.000-08:00

Finally wound our way to Virginia Beach and were lovingly met by our grandchildren and Jaime and Rachel. We checked out Jaime's mounds of boxes in her new/old house, and then set our sails for JoAnne's house. At JoAnne's the rest of the family rolled in from various points: Aunt Viv and Uncle Don from CA, Paul and MaryAnn from Maryland. Drew came back from work, Bailey came back from a neighbors, and we had our long-awaited reunion. JoAnne's easily accomodated us, and we also enjoyed sharing Thanksgiving with Drew's manufacturing partner, Johnny and Mia Swann and their two children, Karsten and Solveig. Thanksgiving was delectable, and our sharing was weepy and poignant. We missed Joey's warmth and humor, and faced for the first time that there will be no more holidays with him in this world. We all look forward to our reunion with him in Heaven.

Thanks for making our cross-country road trip with us, and especially thanks for all the love and support we have gotten from you all since May. You have carried us and we would never have survived the parting of our son without you. And to Liza, many thanks again for comforting us thru your blogging talents. It has all meant so much to us.

All our heartfelt love and gratitude on this Thanksgiving,
Joe and Karen

Time With Wendy, Breakfast at Joseph's ... Part 11 of the Sentimental Journey

2008-11-26T11:59:00.000-08:00

We are on the last leg of our journey to Virginia Beach. If all goes as planned by our trusty Magellan GPS, we should be there in less than 3 hours.

Yesterday, we were high in the Smoky Mountains, in God's Cathedral, listening to praise music and worshipping the Creator of all this beauty. We saw deer and wild turkeys and a fox, and even a glimpse of a brown bear up on a mountainside amidst the trees. We went over the Newfound Gap on icy,snowy roads, and entered the North Carolina side of the park.

From there we went down to the quaint town of Asheville, NC where we met up with one of our dearest, longtime friends, Wendy. (Some of you may remember her visiting us in Maui about 12 years ago. She came to our Ohana group.)

We stayed several hours at Wendy's cozy little house, reminiscing and sharing our stories with each other. Wendy had hosted Joey and Rachel in her home in New York two years ago, when they were traveling across the US. We cried together and we sat amazed again at how God has woven our lives together thru the good times and the struggles. What a treasure to have friends who know you thru and thru and love you still.

We ate breakfast in our hotel restaurant, coincidentally called Joseph's Restaurant. Another poignant reminder of the son we love and miss so much.

Seeing his name just reminds us of what an amazing person he was (and is) and that our lives are so much richer for having had him. Even if we had known we would lose his presence at age 28, we still would have chosen the privilege of raising him, and every minute and every dollar we spent on him. What an awesome man he was to all of us who knew and loved him, and someday we will meet again.

The Opryland Hotel and a Little Miracle - Sentimental Journey Part 10

2008-11-24T22:00:00.000-08:00

The Christmas lights were beautiful at this hotel in Nashville, TN. It's a cool place. The Grand Ole Opry is right next door and country music plays 24 hours a day. We went to lunch before leaving and met Chelie, our good-natured waitress. When Joe asked her how she was doing today, she replied: "I'm good and I'm blessed." Joe was having a rough day, missing Joey a lot, and feeling really discouraged. He asked her how she was blessed, because he needed to hear that. She was a little taken aback, and stammered out a response to the effect that no matter what happens in her life she is blessed.

A few minutes later, she returned to our table with the water and explained herself further. She said she always says the same thing--"I am good and I am blessed" when people ask her how she is, because she feels God takes good care of her thru good and bad, and she wants to honor Him no matter what is going on in her life. She said Joe was the first person who had ever asked her how she was blessed.

She went on to say that she had her problems and that even today she had no home to go to when her work day ended. She was a single mom of five, and had given notice on their place because it was not a safe place to raise her kids. She didn't have enough money for her first and last month's rent in a new place, but she knew she had to get her kids out and was just trusting that God knew and would take care of them. She said miracles happen every day.

Joe told her about losing our son 6 months ago and his deep grief over that. She listened compassionately and then told him she had lost her own mother not long ago and understood the feelings of loss.

She told us about her children, and that she was really proud of them because they live very simply, but never complain about it. They don't even have a car, choosing instead to walk to the market, and hitch a ride to work with friends to save that expense. Her oldest daughter had just finished boot camp with the Air Force. She was very content with her life...all she needed was a home for her kids. She knew God was going to meet that need for them and she didn't know how but she was just going to trust Him for it.

Her peace was contagious, and her faith was encouraging. The more she talked about her faith and trust despite her circumstances, the more encouraged we got. As she walked away, Joe and I looked at each other and instantly knew what we were going to do....and we did exactly what you would do if you were given the opportunity!

Her joy spread to us, and we left with smiles on our faces, having received our own little miracle for the day.

Let's Talk About Graceland - Sentimental Journey Part 9

2008-11-24T17:22:00.001-08:00

It's not for everybody! One couple we met while traveling told us not to waste our time. But if you have ever been all shook up, loved someone tender, or rushed in like a fool, then Graceland is for you!!! It is SPECTACULAR. It is the most visited house in America, now exceeding the White House.

It consists of the white-columned colonial home that Elvis bought when he was 22, the 20 acre grounds, the trophy room packed with gold records and gold-studded suits, and the meditation garden where he is buried next to his parents. We loved every minute of it!

What comes out loud and clear is that Elvis loved his mama and daddy, his little girl Lisa Marie, his country and the Lord. He also had more talent and money than he knew what to do with, and too many people living off of his good nature.

The final song on the video playing in the trophy room is a very moving rendition of "All My Trials, Lord, Soon Be Over", then you meander over to the meditation garden where his eternal flame flickers on.
His tomb is surrounded by flowers and gifts, which arrive every single day from fans all over the world. It left us with the sense that his trials are indeed over, that he lives on in a better place, that he's at peace in the presence of the Lord.

It made us wonder if Joey has run into him yet, up there in Heaven.

Back To Reality - Sentimental Journey Part 8

2008-11-23T20:51:00.000-08:00

Here's what awaited us after 24 hours of gracious Southern living: a perfectly flat tire. Duct tape won't work on this one!
AAA comes to the rescue! Don't leave home without it! Our schedule is thrown off- I guess we won't be able to spray graffiti expletives on the Bill Clinton Library today!

Check out the light repair---the stick worked perfectly to stabilize
the headlamp! Yankee ingenuity, for sure! Gunther marches on!

Inside the van, all of Joey's things from his house in LA--surfboard, golf clubs, snowboard, and his green chair--- all too precious to part with. They will find a new home in VA.

We love you, Joey.

***

COMING UP: Graceland!

"I Love The South" - Sentimental Journey Part 7

2008-11-23T20:29:00.000-08:00

The Capital Hotel is where we ate our breakfast. Built in 1873, it is
southern hospitality at it's finest. The people all ooze with charm
and grace and courtesy. Almost as good as the spirit of Aloha!

The Peabody Hotel in Arkansas (and the Posh Ducks) - Sentimental Journey Part 6

2008-11-23T16:09:00.000-08:00

Whoever told you the south was full of rednecks and hillbillies hasn'tbeen to Little Rock. This hotel is beautiful, and the ducks are the main attraction.

They bring them out of the Duck Palace, every morning at 11am and march them thru the lobby on a red carpet accompanied by John Philip Souza music. The ducks walk up the little stairs and jump into the fountain, where they swim till 5 pm. Then the whole spectacle is reversed and they return to their palace for the night!

Oklahoma City National Memorial - Part 5 of the Sentimental Journey

2008-11-23T06:17:00.000-08:00

These pictures are from the Oklahoma City National Memorial. It was built in honor of those who died during the attack on the Murrah Federal Building in 1995. It was a beautiful and moving memorial place, laid out in the exact place where the building once stood. The reflecting pond now stretches out where the road used to be in front of the building. The bronze chair sculptures are for the 168 people who died from the explosion, 19 of whom were innocent children who were in the daycare facility at the time. The fence outside the memorial is covered with stuffed animals and toys and pictures, all placed by visitors to the site. The graffiti on the wall, demanding justice for the victims, was written by a first responder on the day of the terror act. The statue of Jesus weeping is on the corner across the street from the site, placed there by a church, with the inscription, "And Jesus Wept".

The beautiful golden tree surrounded by the rock wall survived the explosion because it's roots were deep. There's a lesson there for all of us.

Cheap Gas! Duct Tape - Sentimental Journey Part 4

2008-11-22T17:25:00.001-08:00

We Miss You, Joey - The Sentimental Journey Special Post

2008-11-22T09:19:00.001-08:00

Today is the 6 month mark since Joey's departure to Heaven. We try not to say, "since Joey died" anymore. Some would say that's a euphemism, a form of denial, and a sugar-coat of the facts, and I guess that's partly true. The word "death" has become a painful word that we don't like to use anymore. It's jarring, and dark and final and hopeless. Painful. We need more than those hard words to get by..

Our progress in dealing with the loss of Joey is determined by one thing---our hope in a place called Heaven. We have found that focussing on God's promises is the ONLY way out. God's words about Heaven, eternal life, our blessed hope---those are the words that heal and strengthen. The past six months have been hard work---a difficult climb out of a deep pit of crushing loss and disappointment. So when we talk about Joey's departure to Heaven, it is a statement of faith on our part...a declaration that there is more than meets the eye in our loss.

Though Joey is no longer here on earth, and that's the hard part, he is still nonetheless very much alive. He is in Paradise. He is experiencing the joy of being in the presence of God, and the pleasures at His right hand. His time in the courts of Heaven have been better than thousands of days anywhere else. He sees God and the saints and the angels and is also watching the spiritual battle on earth, which is far more gripping than the best movie he could ever see at the Cinerama Dome in LA. He is hearing music and making music in a whole new way, creating with some of the finest musicians ever known. He is talking with some of the finest minds in history--poets, writers, thinkers---people he read about and admired while on earth. He is praying for those he loves---his grandpa and his mom and dad, and his sisters and brothers-in-law, and his beloved nieces and nephews, and precious Rachel. We can almost here him cheering us on to keep the faith....trust...believe.

So for the past six months, day by day, layer by layer, we have been adding to our storehouse of promises. We are creating a rich view of Heaven, based on God's word, so that we can bear the absence of our Joey. And God is working hope in us, so that we are comforted that this is a temporary loss. And for now, Joey is enjoying and exploring Heaven, and as we wait for the moment of reunion, he too is waiting for us to arrive.

Get Your Kicks on Route 66 - Part 3 of the "A Sentimental Journey"

2008-11-21T18:37:00.000-08:00

Route 66 was the original interstate highway. Stretching between LA and Chicago, it was the only way to get across country before the 60's and the advent of the interstate highway system we use now. Route 66 had a culture all its own with snappy service stations, refreshing soda fountains and teepee-shaped motor hotels springing up all along its 1600 miles. Joe and I both remember it well from our childhoods in southern California.

As we travel along I-40, which stretches from coast-to-coast, we are running parallel with the old Route 66, and it runs for miles right next to the interstate. We've been surprised that many of the towns we are stopping in have a designated "Historic Area" devoted to Route 66 and it's small businesses reminiscent of the 50's. That makes us feel real-l-l-ly old...our history is now "Historic"! The signmakers are obviously too young to know better.

The thing about Route 66 is this--in spite of its promise to give us our kicks, there really ain't much going on. Especially across the Great Plains fo the US. I keep checking the AAA guidebooks for POI's (for the uninitiated, that means points of interest) and have yet to find anything worth stopping for. So we are driving on and on and on....trying to make our 500 miles to Oklahoma City by midnight. Keep your fingers crossed!

On a happy note, Albuquerque is a pretty charming place. We visited the oldest church in Albuquerque (1703) and found it peaceful and soothing.

At the store attached to the convent, we found a beautiful iron cross to go near Joey's memorial tree in JoAnne's backyard. We found crosses for everyone in our family...small reminders of our hope in Heaven.

BIG BLESSINGS - A Sentimental Journey Part 2

2008-11-20T10:16:00.000-08:00

We left Maui last Sunday intending to visit LA area friends and family, then pack up Gunther and leave. Gunther had been in storage at Rocky and Doreen Liuzzi's storage facility in Temecula for the past 6 months, cozy and safe, but not moving! And now we were wondering if he could even make the journey! So in a flash of inspiration, Joe contacted Lloyd and Renee Mize...dear old friends from our CA church who lived near the storage facility. They were immediately responsive...Lloyd had dreamed about Joe the night before! It was a sign! They offered to do whatever we needed.

Joe asked Lloyd if he could get Gunther out of storage, and as an experienced RV afficionado, test-drive Gunther and give us the verdict on his road-worthiness. Lloyd, who has plenty to do running his own life and business, put us first and graciously agreed to do it all. Unfortunately the Mighty Road Warrior failed the test. Six months in mothballs and he had lost his edge. What to do now?

Lloyd came to the rescue. He found Scott of Quality Automotive in Temecula, the finest auto mechanic in Southern California, and told him our story. Scott learned about Joey and Rachel, and Gunther's legendary travels, and our quest to imitate a small portion of that journey in honor of Joey. Scott accepted the challenge, knowing our short time frame to get it done, and went to work. Parts were ordered and Gunther was up on the rack before we could say "Master Card".

Scott had 24 hours to get Gunther rolling, and he pulled it off in style. He got us our smog check so we could register him, and even ran Gunther thru the carwash before we got there to pick him up. Now Gunther hums, he sings, he's purring like a kitten...he is the happiest thing on 4 wheels. Just like a character out of the "Cars" movie, he seems to have a big smile on his face, and enjoying nothing more than rolling down the highway! Thanks Scott...you and your awesome crew made it happen!

So we owe a lot to the people who have come beside us to support our quest. The Liuzzi's for their endless generosity and use of their storage facility, Lloyd and Renee, who took Gunther out of storage, found Scott, and enlisted his enthusiastic support, and then fed and pampered us out on their beautiful ranch in Anza, while we waited. And Scott, who could have told Lloyd he was too busy to deal with a 21 year old VW van, instead threw all of his skill and his whole heart into the effort and gave us a fine-tuned machine.

Because of their generous efforts, I am writing this from the Grand Canyon where we spent a beautiful day and a half reliving a segment of Joey's journey. We got up for the sunrise this morning and spread some of Joey's ashes into the deep and beautiful canyon. We miss you son and hope you are enjoying our Sentimental Journey, and all of our friends who have made it possible.

Karen and Joe

GUNTHER... A Sentimental Journey .. Part 1

2008-11-19T08:48:00.000-08:00

We are taking Joey's VW van, affectionately known as Gunther, cross-country to our grandchildren in VA. It's a nifty and nimble vehicle. It's got a stove, a frig, and a table. The roof pops up and it sleeps a family of 4 plus little Aidan. We could have shipped it for cheaper, but we wanted to experience a bit of what Joey experienced the last year of his life-- as he and Rachel drove the northern hemisphere, from Alaska to the Panama Canal, from west coast to east coast and back again. They logged 27,000 miles. We are doing a mere 12% of that, 3000 miles from LA to Virginia Beach (in 8 days). We wanted to share some of his zest for life and his beautiful and spontaneous spirit of adventure. We wanted to have some time to reflect and honor our son as we journey together, listening to music, and talking about the adventure of life, and our new chapter with Joey in Heaven.

This morning, after Joe's impressive all night drive, we are in Kingman Arizona, just over the state line, filling up Gunther's tank and our's, at a gas station with the world's cleanest bathroom (thank you God for road trip mercies!) We slept in the pop-up last night, which was very cool and adventurous for us!!

We woke up with frozen toes, but well-rested. We are now 4 hours away from the Grand Canyon, where we will be spending the next 24 hours. On our next post, we'll tell you about what happened in LA before we started the trip....cuz it was a series of divine appointments and special moments---confirmation that this trip was the right thing for us to do!

Our love to all...keep us in your prayers,
Joe and Karen in the Gunther Machine!

Gunther Back On The Road

2008-11-15T06:41:00.000-08:00

Who is Gunther? He's the most precious Van of Joe(y) and Rachel! The way I look at it, he's kinda like their lovechild :). Here's a link to Van Down By The River on Gunther's early days. That van was with Joey and Rachel through thick and thin, duct tape and all. Just look at these end of the trip photos:

Joe and Karen (and might be Rachel too - I am not sure) will be driving Gunther across the states once again. What an adventure! I told Joe we should blog their trip - Joey would, don't you think?

I Know Joey Is Happy and Proud of Joe and Karen

2008-11-12T08:09:00.000-08:00

I was watching the splendid slideshow created by David Hessemer on their Overnight at Healeaka and I couldn't help but think of how Joey must have been so proud of Joe and Karen for doing "walking the crater and spending night there". What an adventure! Here's the link to the slide show (in case some of you readers are not on Facebook yet :)

http://hawaiianimagesonline.com/Showit/Haleakala/

* Photo is also from Facebook, courtesy of Elis.

Better Is One Day

2008-11-07T22:03:00.001-08:00

Cuy Pirates

2008-10-30T00:03:00.000-07:00

From Design Aspirations

I Will Be Still, Know You Are God

2008-10-29T08:35:00.001-07:00

Can A Halloween Photo Come Any Cuter Than This?

2008-10-23T00:35:00.001-07:00

Joey Loves Keanae

2008-10-20T07:18:00.001-07:00

We had a wonderful time this weekend at Keanae. We went there with K and C Kepler and their family. As usual, it was a very relaxing time, so rejuvenating for the mind, body and soul.

As I said posted before, Joey loves Keanae. That's one of his favorite places on earth. Keanae holds many wonderful memories of Joey - I wonder if Joe and Karen had visited there since Joey's passing. I think it would be healing. The Keanae journal has recorded many of Joey's thoughts and reflections. It was nice reading some of them again.

The photo below was taken at the lanai (porch for those who live on the mainland :). Everyone loves that swing. You sit there, looking at the ocean and ahh... it's a bliss. Joey even took it to the next level of bliss - joy as he plays ukulele while sitting on the swing. I can almost hear the Hawaiian version of "Somewhere over the Rainbow" being played.

* I posted a photo of Joey on my new blog A Maui Blog - I couldn't resist not sneaking one of it in there :) Check it out :)

Happy Birthday Papa!

2008-10-10T23:00:00.000-07:00

I Can Only Imagine

2008-10-07T00:05:00.001-07:00

Reading Karen's post on Heaven reminded me of this song...

* Story of this song is HERE and HERE.

Why doesn't the Bible tell us more about Heaven?

2008-10-03T22:54:00.001-07:00

* Posted by Karen at Facebook

I've been wondering that a lot since Joey died. I've wondered what he's doing, what he's thinking, what he's seeing, what he's feeling. Does he miss us, does he see us, does he get status reports on us like we get on Facebook? Is he praying for us? Does he actually get to speak with Jesus, Abe Lincoln, Will Shakespeare, Johnny Cash? What does he do "all day long"?

Why so little concrete information about Heaven? We hear that it's good, and that it's far beyond anything we know here, but there's not much info actually describing the place--you know, "A Day in the Life" in Heaven.

Then I read this Bible verse this morning. Jesus is talking:
"I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe;
how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things? " John 3:12

He's using the argument of the lesser to the greater. If I don't believe the things I can see, how can I believe the things I can't see. It stopped me in my mental tracks. I have to admit that I still don't consistently believe the things He has told me about earthly things: That He will provide, that He will never leave me or forsake me, that He works all things together for good. After all these years of hearing God's promises, I still have trouble with the basics, especially during hard times.

And apparently I am not alone. Not too many Bible characters have been given revelation about Heaven. Less than a handful. St. Paul had a vision of Heaven and mentioned the fact of it, but never wrote the details of what he saw. Too sacred, I think...or beyond description. Or perhaps God commanded that he keep silence.

So even though I don't get the particular answers I am looking for, still I am comforted by Jesus' words. It tells me He understands my curiosity. It tells me that the silence about Heaven is intentional and not an oversight. It tells me that there are things too big for me, and One greater than me is in control.

Just as there are profound things we don't tell children till they are mature enough to handle it, so perhaps the same is true with Heaven. We don't have the spiritual maturity to comprehend much about Heaven. Only that it's there.

Jesus said another comforting thing about Heaven, Jn. 14 1-4 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms. If it were not so I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you that where I am, you may be also."

Basically, He is saying we are just going to have to trust Him on this one. He says He's told us the truth and would tell us if it weren't so. Just trust Him.

So that's what I'll do.

Remembering Joey - A Fun Post :)

2008-09-30T07:48:00.001-07:00

I took the following post from Facebook's Remember Joseph Johnsons Group - it's written by Josh Spencer. I just want to mention that both Josh and Joey are very dear to us (we were kidless at that time and they were our kids, sort of ) and it was at this time that we were very close to them, when they were the "young men". Kelly Kepler is also very dear to us - these post brought back a lot of great memories :) I cracked up when I first read this post - I am sure you're find it hilarious as well. This will bring a smile to Karen and Joe's faces :)

Okay, I'm finally on Facebook (sorta), so I can post to this blog. Ever since Joey left, I've been wanting to write some grand essay on him for Rachel and the Johnsons' reading pleasure, but that's just my perfectionist procrastination. I've gotta let that go and just get my memories of Joe down before I forget them. Memory, definitely one of the first things to go. Anyway, here we go:

Before I ever met Joey I wanted to beat him up. I was 19 and spending my first summer on Maui, and my new girlfriend at the time - Kelly Kepler - was at a retreat in CA. Somehow I heard about this great guy that everybody loved there, especially Kelly, and that he was moving to Maui. I was insecure back in those days, and my insecurity took form through jealousy. I was ready to take him down as soon as he stepped foot on the island.

Our first actual meeting was at Bradley's house across the driveway from the Johnsons' new house, which which just across the gully from my family's house. I felt like such an idiot when I met him. He was just a 15 yr. old kid, skinny and obviously nervous. How could I beat up a kid barely into puberty? We talked about heavy metal and he tried to bluff that he knew all about the bands I was into. He didn't. I saw right through him, that he was a great bull-shitter in the making (something I wasn't), and I knew we'd be great friends.

To his credit, he waited two years for Kelly and me to break up, before he put the moves on her again.

Importance of Vacation According to Joey (An E-mail to JR Thompson)

2008-09-29T01:16:00.000-07:00

Always the sales man ... here's an email from Joe

It is my supreme belief that man is not completed by mere work alone. And while we love our respective livelihoods, its important for each of us to take some time away from neutering dogs, selling fast food franchises, drawing on computers, picketing in front of CBS, working for the man (ahem Rach & JR), and doing....well, whatever it is that I'm doing these days...to grow intellectually, spiritually, and as friends. That is why it is time for all of us to take a vacation.

For those of you that just got tense at the thought of trying to squeeze one more thing into your schedule, consider yourself my friend no more. In fact Beth and Theo are already on probation for missing the Costa Rica trip last year. I am confident there are none of you out there. But for those on the edge of their seats waiting to hear about what amazing plans we have in store, I will delay no more.

Have you ever heard of a little place called Grand Targhee Ski Resort? Thats right you haven't. Because while all the capitalist jokers swarm Jackson Hole for a chance to try and squeeze into bad cowboy attire, Targhee remains a virtually virgin winter wonderland. (see attached photo of my last visit). Just think: dry powder, delicious elk/moose/venison chili, the voluptuous Grand Teton range at sunset, and many Moose Drool Ales in a hot tub surrounded with snow. No, I havent gone into selling timeshares. Im selling share-time with dear friends (wow that was atrocious).

So now I wanna know how you all feel about sneaking away for about a week sometime in March for this idyllic retreat from reality. There is still plenty of snow at that time.

For all of you that are of a more begintermediate ski level, fear not. Targhee has a great balance of terrain for all levels. There is a fun town nearby with Jackson, and most importantly, if we get a group together this could be a rather affordable Spring Break in the snow...without the Girls Gone Wild. JR has crunched some numbers...

Flights - $280 - $400 (LAX to JAC)
House - $700 - $900/week (this is for a whole house, so it would be rather affordable with a group)
Car - $400/week (also not bad with a group split)
Lift Tickets - $59/day
Food - same as in LA or Seattle

I will be eagerly awaiting your reply.

- JJ

* Post was taken from "Remembering Joseph Johnson" group at Facebook. It was posted by JR on "vacation".

Belief - Words and Music by J Johnson

2008-09-28T08:44:00.000-07:00

Belief
Words and Music by J Johnson

See you move, see you slide my possessions cross the floor
I see you smile and I beg for you to stay a little more
The words come without effort, full of meaning its so right
We end up drinking conversation through the middle of the night

When your finally gone, my thoughts lay rest on you
My body aches for wine but my heart it aches for you

I find it hard to believe that youd leave without a trace
Cause Im in deep dark discussion with the meaning of your face
I want it all even the pleasure with the pain and the plight
I see our future before I know a bit about your life

Chorus
Building part

Outro

* Posted by JR Thompson on Facebook

Praise You In The Storm

2008-09-26T23:13:00.001-07:00

Rachel On Our Mind ...

2008-09-24T22:42:00.000-07:00

Rachel leaves Maui tomorrow and the Maui Johnsons are sad. Please pray for Rachel as she returns to the mainland and rebuilds her life. Karen also requested me to post this:

Rachel was such a beautiful counterpart to Joey. They were well-matched in their curiosity, intelligence, and spirit of adventure. Their tastes in music, food and art seemed to be parallel. They both loved to surf, snowboard, and play Scrabble. They had so much fun together and they shared their faith, their friends, and their love for family. They were a great couple and we all loved being with Rachel. The grandkids already considered her their aunty, and still do. She is just a superb human being and we all adore her.

Rachel's unknowing gift to us all was her beautiful eye for photography. She chronicled Joey's last three years with hundreds of exquisite photos and gave us a treasure that will last a lifetime.

Thank you Rachel, for loving Joey and loving our family, and giving so much to each of us. You are the beautiful silver lining in our cloud.

The Johnsons

Joe and Rachel on Keaneae

Heaven

2008-09-23T10:19:00.000-07:00

[John 14:1-3, NKJV]

Jesus said, "Let not your heart be troubled;
you believe in God, believe also in Me.
In My Father's house are many mansions, if it were not so,
I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.
And if I go and prepare a place for you,
I will come again and receive you to Myself;
that where I am, there you may be also"

***

Go to Greg Laurie's Blog to read more about heaven. Click here.

How Are Joe and Karen Doing?

2008-09-22T08:20:00.000-07:00

Instead of me trying to explain how they are doing... I thought I would re-post here something that Greg Laurie wrote on his blog about "how are they doing" as they grieve for the lost of their son. Read below, and for more, please go to Greg Laurie's Blog.

***

One thing often asked of someone when they have had someone close to them die is “How are you doing?” Please know that is the hardest question to answer.

Can I just answer for all people who are grieving a recent loss right now? Not very well.

Please don’t hold that against us. It’s just that we are missing that person badly. We are very, very sad.

We have moments of peace, even joy, but more moments of sadness. We are suffering, yet learning. Grieving, yet rejoicing. Mourning and occasionally laughing. But a good part of the time, we are sad.

It hits us really hard when we are not expecting it. Little landmines we step on, filled with memories.

So, if you happen to catch us at such a moment and ask, “How are you doing?,” you may not like what you see and hear.

God is with us

But know this–God is with us. There is even a blessedness in mourning.

Jesus said, “Blessed are they that mourn, for they shall be comforted.” But it is mourning, which includes deep sadness, tears, and pain.

Somewhere, we have gotten the idea that sadness and mourning are to be immediately replaced by happiness and celebration. I think in time they will be, but there will always be a hole in the life of a person who has lost a loved one.

The Bible says there is “A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak” (Ecclesiastes 3:4,7 NLT). After Stephen was martyred, “Some godly people came and buried Stephen with loud weeping” (Acts 8:2 NLT emphasis mine).

We won’t “get over it”

There is a lot of weeping when a loved one has died, especially if it was unexpected. They simply will not “get over it.”

When a person has been a part of your life, like our son Christopher was for us for 33 years, you don’t just “edit” them out of the script. You notice that empty chair at the table. They are still so much a part of you, yet they are just gone.

That is very hard to comprehend.

A better thing to say

So, instead of asking “How are you doing?,” maybe you’re better off just saying, “I am sorry for your loss,and I am praying for you!” Or smile and say, “Love you!”

The person may want to talk about it, and if they do, listen, don’t talk. Job’s counselors had that right. It’s when they started talking that the problems began.

You see, when you are mourning, you are vulnerable. The armor is down, and you are sensitive to the right and wrong things being said. You can be easily hurt and, at the same time, helped by what people say and do.

So only speak if you are sure you have the right words from the Lord to give to someone who is grieving. The Bible says, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver” (Proverbs 25:11 NKJV).

But do say something!

Having said that you should not say the wrong thing, do say something! The only thing more painful than having said the wrong thing is saying nothing.

I know you might be afraid the person will cry if you mention their loved one. But they might resent it if you don’t.

Crying is not necessarily a bad thing anyway. There can be tears of joy.

You need to know that when people are grieving, they are “not themselves.” You don’t know how you will react to things, and thus people do not know what to say.

If someone tells me a story about my son, or shares a memory, I like to hear that. I have been getting a crash course in this, so it’s all very fresh to me. I have lost my grandparents and my mom, and as hard as those were, nothing is like this.

So please be patient with mourning people. Give them time. Don’t forget to keep praying for them. Store these thoughts up in your mind, like a squirrel would store up nuts for the winter. Because someday you may need to know them for yourself.

by Greg Laurie
.

One Of The Many Things About Joey ... He Loves His Big Sisters

2008-09-21T23:53:00.000-07:00

Joey loved his big sisters....they were present shortly after he was born, peering at him with wonder and curiosity, which later became poking at him and provoking him, which eventually became pride and adoration. They each would travel miles just to be together, their bond unbreakable, and he thoroughly enjoyed the company of his sisters. They shared 50% of the same DNA, they laughed at the same jokes, and remembered the same childhood stories. They spent 28 years together, processing life, and advising each other, and cheering each other on. We have so many photos of the three of them together, Joey often in the middle between the two of them, sheltered by their love and hugging back. When he was an adult he towered over them both, and would wrap his arms around them--a huddle of strength and familiarity. His sisters enriched his life and were key to some pivotal moments:

Jaime, by turning off the pool pump when Joey was drowning at age 8, saved his life. Her quick-thinking act in a frightening and chaotic moment, gave us another 20 precious years with Joey.

JoAnne, by cramming to graduate in May 08, when she should have sensibly waited another semester, unwittingly created a grand family reunion, with both of Joey's families...us and the Cox/Placke Clan. She created the moment for our final farewell with Joey--a week filled with precious memories, tender moments, and some of our most cherished photos. He went home to Heaven unexpectedly 4 days later.

His sisters stand as sentinels over his life...protecting and guarding him, honoring the beauty and vitality of their beloved brother. His name is permanently tattooed on their arms. Their lives will never be the same again, emptier without the brother who made life so much fun, but in Heaven they will have eternity to hug and hold and laugh together again.

* posted by Karen at Facebook.

Karen Missing Joey ...

2008-09-20T14:57:00.000-07:00

I am missing... sitting with him chatting mindlessly while he focused intently on his blackberry--"multitasking"---just being with him while he worked hard.

I am missing...watching him swing my grandkids around in the grass, and chase them, and tell them hilarious stories as they sat around him, enraptured by his imagination and firing up theirs.

I am missing....eating breakfast and dinner together on the lanai and his enthusiasm for gourmet food and new tastes...i.e.. avocado toast

I am missing....watching him walk down to the Cove, surfboard under his arm, carried by his long swaying stride --- pleasure and peace on his face.

I am missing...him patiently teaching me how to use itunes and ipods and google picasa, and other techno-stuff. He nudged me into new things.

I am missing...the melodious plunk, plunk, plunk of his ukulele in my home.

I am missing...stirring and challenging discussions of politics, and then a smile!

I am missing...shiny auburn hair, chocolate drop eyes, long, strong legs, sensitive fingers, and one crooked tooth in an otherwise radiant smile.

I am missing...spoiling him with love and fun on his birthday.

I am missing....the feeling he gave me that I was such a wonderful mother.

Joey In Worship

2008-09-18T08:32:00.000-07:00

If I were to ask you what Joey's favorite worship songs are, what would you say? I was just wondering what songs he is playing in heaven right now ...

.

Wordless Wednesday: Bliss

2008-09-17T11:28:00.000-07:00

***

*Taken from Remembering Joseph Johnson (at Facebook)
Thanks Rachel for the Photo

Dreams ...

2008-09-16T07:51:00.000-07:00

*Remembering Joey group at Facebook has a section called "Dreams". I got this post of Karen from there. This was posted on August 25, 2008:

I finally had my first dream about Joey, early yesterday morning. I dreamed he was in our house and he was hugging me by the entry table. Joe and his two sisters were there, too, just busy around the house. I could hear him talking while he was hugging me and feel his voice resonating in his chest. I told him, "I am trying to memorize the sound of your voice and your laugh, so I have it when you leave". He just smiled at that and chuckled a bit.

I woke up so happy...like I had just actually been with him. I hope I have another dream about him soon.

- Karen

***
This post reminds me of another dream story called "Footprints In The Sand". There's a video created inspired by it and I am posting it here for Karen and Joe:

FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND

One night I had a dream--
I dreamed I was walking
along the beach with the Lord
and across the sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints,
one belonged to me and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that many times along the path of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest
and saddest times in my life.
This really bothered me and
I questioned the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you would walk with me all the way,
but I have noticed that during
the most troublesome times in my life
there is only one set of footprints.
"I don't understand why in times
when I needed you most,
you should leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child,
I love you and I would never, never leave you
during your times of trial and suffering.
"When you saw only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

...Mary Stevenson
.

They Will Never Forget ...

2008-09-14T08:08:00.001-07:00

Not that they needed a tattoo to "never forget Joey", but these tattoos are a symbol of love. Not only will Joseph's memory live in their hearts, it is now forever engraved in their flesh. Shaun and JoAnne, Joey is smiling at you :)

Sunday Morning Quote

2008-09-09T08:56:00.000-07:00

-Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

Heaven

2008-09-09T07:56:00.000-07:00

"And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, "Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men and He shall dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself shall be among them, and He shall wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there shall no longer be any death; there shall no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away."

Revelation 21:3-4

Unkie JJ (Part 3) - He Loves His Nieces - Claire, Bailey and Izzy

2008-09-07T08:19:00.000-07:00

Unkie JJ (Part 2) - Like JJ like Aidan

2008-09-06T00:04:00.000-07:00

There's no doubt about it - Aidan's got Uncle JJ's charm! Aidan is just one of the cutest kids I've met! I can just imagine Joey when he was a little boy that he's like Aidan :) This little boy's got a dynamic personality!

It made me a little sad to think that Aidan's time with his Unkie JJ was short. But I am sure he would hear a lot of stories about Unkie JJ as he grows up. And thank God to whoever invented photography, Aidan will be able to look at photos of him and his Unkie JJ together and he would know that his Unkie JJ loved him.

Exploring with Uncle JJ

There's Uncle JJ swinging Aidan!

Unkie JJ loves Aidan!
.

Unkie JJ (Part 1) - written by Chase Evangelista

2008-09-04T08:21:00.000-07:00

Unkie JJ and Chase hnaging out at Papa and Nana's condo on Maui

* The following is an excerpt from a school work that Chase wrote about his family. In one section of that homework he was asked to write who is the most interesting person in his family and he said it's Uncle JJ:

Now the most interesting person in my family is my Uncle J.J (that’s Joe Johnson to you). He is the most interesting person because he is an excellent guitar player. He does concerts at one of the largest churches in Maui, Hawaii. He and his girlfriend like to enjoy life by doing things like going on 12 month road trips in a $3000 van. He has been all the way from the Panama Canal to Northern Alaska. He and his girlfriend have been West Coast and East Coast, and back again.

Many things make him the most interesting person in my family because he is the only long haired redhead in the family, and he invests large portions of his money in the stock market. Guess what? He is also the guy that thinks of the Red Bull commercials. Red Bull pays $15,000 a month him to sit around and think of advertising ideas and commercials. He gets to work with people like Shaun White, the Olympic gold medalist snowboarder, at the Winter X Games for him to support the consumption of Red Bull. He gets cool jobs like this because he got a marketing degree at USC. On his off time our families get together and go to a huge ski resort or go surfing in Maui.

Oh Love That Will Not Let Me Go

2008-09-02T23:55:00.000-07:00

by George Matheson, 1882

O Love that wilt not let me go,
I rest my weary soul in thee;
I give thee back the life I owe,
that in thine ocean depths its flow
may richer, fuller be.

O Light that followest all my way,
I yield my flickering torch to thee;
my heart restores its borrowed ray,
that in thy sunshine’s blaze its day
may brighter, fairer be.

O Joy that seekest me through pain,
I cannot close my heart to thee;
I trace the rainbow through the rain,
and feel the promise is not vain,
that morn shall tearless be.

O Cross that liftest up my head,
I dare not ask to fly from thee;
I lay in dust life’s glory dead,
and from the ground there blossoms red
life that shall endless be.

For a Youtube Video of this song, click HERE.

Now, Caption This:

2008-08-30T23:23:00.001-07:00

Due to the popularity of the first "Caption This" post, I am posting another classic photo that is worth "captioning" :) Let's hear what you have to say.....

Joey and Kids

2008-08-30T02:01:00.001-07:00

One of the many great characteristics of Joey that I really like is his love for kids. He is just naturally comfortable around them and is so loving with the kids (just like his parents). Below is one of the photos from their (he and Rachel) trip.

In Matthew 18:4-6, Jesus invites us to come to Him
“like little children” and says
“whoever humbles himself like this child
is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

This one below was taken at Pukalani. Notice how children re happily coming up to him. The verses with these 2 photos are sweet reminders that Joey's love for kids made Jesus happy :)

Matthew 1:14 Jesus says,

“Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them!
For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to such as these.”

I was reading some posts on "Remembering Joey" group at Facebook and Debbie Ascraft's post stood out. "Taking to Joey", she said:

Things I've recently learned from you, Joey... Have fun and just go for it! Don't forget to hug everyone in sight! You can't have too many friends. You can't play too many instruments! Truly love and thank those closest to you often. When you travel, don't forget the duct tape! Honesty really is the best policy. Play a lot, laugh a lot, love a lot, stay close to God and live out loud! Mahalo Joey!! We all love you and miss you...

P.S. At your memorial there was the cutest little girl a couple rows in front of me and she was having a blast making a hat out of your service program. Her mom kept scolding her and I thought...you would so totally be making a hat right along with her! So, you also reminded me that the ultimate way to play with kids is to be one right along with them! Thanks

***

Speaking of kids, Joey is a wonderful "Unkie" to Chase, Bailey, Claire, Izzy and Aiden. Photos of them coming up. If you have any special memories of Unkie JJ and kids, or if you have a special photo you like of them, please e-mail them to me.

Heaven - A String of Pearls

2008-08-29T07:27:00.000-07:00

"Heaven - a String of Pearls"

by Thomas Brooks (1657)

"In Your presence is abundant joy;
in Your right hand are eternal pleasures!"
Psalm 16:11

Most professors and people live as if there were no Heaven;
or else as if Heaven were not worth a seeking, worth a desiring--
as if Heaven were a poor, despised, contemptible thing.

But ah, Christians!
be much in desiring and longing to get into that glorious city--
where streets, walls,and gates are all gold--
yes, where pearl is but as mire and dirt; and where are...
all pleasures,
all treasures,
all delights,
all comforts,
all contentments
and that forever!

The word "forever" is a bottomless depth,
a conception without end;
it is a word which sweetens all the glory above,
and which indeed makes heaven to be Heaven!

"And so we will be with the Lord forever!"
1 Thess. 4:17

***

*originally posted on the comment section by Kevin and Shirley

Caption This

2008-08-26T22:10:00.000-07:00

Let's see if some of you can give a witty caption to this photo. I know Joey would. Let's hear from you ... Leave your creative caption in the comment section. Mahalo :)

My Son, The Genius

2008-08-22T00:38:00.001-07:00

* Note: I moved down 2 newer posts to keep this Karen's post on top for a few more days. Such an honoring post to Joey and to Jesus. To God be the glory!

Joey went home to be with the Lord three months ago today. In the time since he passed, we have heard over and over again what an amazing person he was. Not a few people have called him a genius, and I have to say we saw him that way ourselves. As his family, we were daily witnesses to his hilarious insights and penetrating analysis of life, culture and current events--- and WE were impressed by him! As his proud mother I actually tried not to boast about him too much! I guess nobody will mind if I do that now.

I first suspected he was smart when he could rattle off all the names of African animals at 18 months...giraffe, warthog, zebra...he knew them all! He was highly verbal, especially for a boy and he loved to read. When he was in second grade, he was tested by our school district and was formally and officially inducted into the GATE program for Gifted and Talented students.

He got mostly A's with little effort, and he could "wing" his way through school projects, presentations, and even speeches with great success in spite of little preparation. One time he got an A on a speech about sharks, a speech he made up on the spot based on what he remembered from the movie "Jaws"! In sixth grade he was class president, student of the year, and he won the school oratorical contest for best memorized speech. He shone even as a kid.

After hormones hit, he was still an effortless A student. He graduated high school with a 3.8 GPA, taking mostly Advanced Placement classes. He was accepted to both UCLA and USC, but chose USC because of a scholarship to their exceptional business program. He flourished in college and became an open-minded person and a critical thinker. And being a well-rounded guy, he didn't merely focus on academics, he also absorbed everything he could about music, rock n' roll and guitar-playing. He was bright, talented and confident.

Once out of college, he started a brilliant career blending his business degree with his love of music. He worked for Universal Music Group, one of the biggest companies in the industry, learning the music biz from the inside. He left Universal to join Filter Magazine, a new music industry mag that promoted the art and artists. By all accounts, he was a brilliant marketer and a great promoter. Last year he started his own marketing division for a company called Sauce Design. He developed marketing strategies for the sports beverage, Red Bull, and was working on a deal with Nike up to his final day.

He got a fat paycheck for all his hard work and had acquired, by age 28, three houses, a nice stock portfolio, two retirement accounts, and a nearly perfect credit score of 815! He had been to Europe three times, to Australia and the Great Barrier Reef, and he'd taken a year-long van tour of North America, west coast to east coast, north to Alaska and south to Panama. He had his own music studio, tons of musical equipment and a half-finished cd of original songs.

He was a brilliant young man and had great success. His numerous achievements, though, couldn't prevent death and they couldn't give him eternal life. When his life was over, he stood before God and I don't think God was even slightly impressed by Joey's brains or his bank account, even if his mother was!

Looking back on his life, there was only one truly brilliant thing that Joey did on earth and that is the only one that matters now---he believed in Jesus Christ.

His childhood faith grew into an adolescent quest which grew into an adult conviction. He believed in Jesus, he believed that the cross of Christ covered his sins, and he believed he was going to meet his Maker one day and would be ready because of his faith.... and not because of anything that he had done or could do himself.

He lived in a very cool world in Hollywood, where Jesus and the concept of faith don't get much airplay, but he died with a Bible by his bedside, and a firm belief in the grace of God. That is paying off SO BIG right now. I like to think he entered Heaven, fell to his knees and thought to himself, "Wow! I am SO glad my parents dragged me to Sunday School!"

The smartest thing my genius son ever did was believe in Jesus. Now three months after going home to Heaven, surrounded by true riches, joy and music the likes of which we can only imagine, if he could he would tell everyone he loved to make sure they do the same. Be brilliant---believe in Jesus!

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son,
that whoever believes in Him, should not perish but
have everlasting life. - John 3:16

That I may gain Christ and be found in Him,

not having my own righteousness,
but that which is thru faith in Christ. - Phil 3:8

***

Posted by Karen in loving memory of her son Joey

The Tale Of Cuys (by Rachel)

2008-08-21T08:27:00.000-07:00

It all began with a bus shelter ad.

Joe and I had just started dating, and were instantly bonded by the creepy, ominous presence of one man: El Cucuy. His huge face was everywhere: plastered around bus benches, bus shelters, and buses throughout the city (hmmm... what demographic do you think they were targeting?). His eyes were stark and vacant, his shirt bright yellow, and his smile psychotic. We couldn't help but stop and imitate every single one that crossed our paths, cracking up.

Eventually El Cucuy grew into so much more than a Mexican morning DJ. With the help of our overactive imaginations, he became a mythical beast - Cucuy, the prehistoric birdlike creature with blood on his beak. The story grew more and more elaborate - his origins, his nemeses, his temperament - and was often accompanied by bird cries and songs.

Cucuy was shorted to Cuy in the habit of nicknames, and adopted as a term of endearment. How an imaginary bloody-beaked creature became our sweetheart nickname is beyond me. But it did.

Cuys stood for something that we could only be with one another. It was a state of being. It stood for lovers, best friends, and partners in weirdness. Even in the roughest times (aka living in a van together), we had one rule: Cuys Never Die. To this, Karen (Joe's mom) has said "until they die and go to heaven." But I disagree. Cuys - in essence, in memory, in life experience, in depth, in love - Never Die.

*originally written by Rachel at FACEBOOK. If you have already commented there and would like to repeat the comment here, please feel free to do so.

Joey's Blogger

2008-08-21T01:18:00.000-07:00

Joey visiting me when I gave birth to my first child/son G.
Now, how many high school kid do you know
would visit an "older" friend in the hospital when she gives birth?
Not many, but Joey is among the few :)

Today is my 3^rd month anniversary as Joey’s blogger. I thought it would be nice to tell you the story behind this “title”.

About two years ago, I started blogging to help me deal with a difficult situation I was in at that time. Blogging was a “cheap therapy” of some sort. Then blogging became an important part of my life, even an important part of my spiritual life.

About the same time, Joey and Rachel started a blog called Van Down By The River. And so the friendship that Joey and I had when he lived on Maui in his teenage years were revived. We got re-connected. I started following their blog.

After the Van trip, Joey and Rachel came home to Maui. On the Sunday that he came to Hope during that visit, we saw each other at the Hope Chapel parking lot. He came up to me with a huge smile, gave me a warm hug, while greeting me saying “How’s my blogger doing?”

“How’s my blogger doing?” That greeting meant a lot to me at that time. Joey could have said “hello, how are you” and it would have been sweet enough, but for him to say “how’s my blogger doing” was special because blogging held a very soft spot in my heart at that time. I felt that he “cared” and that he’s in tune with me. I appreciated him so much and can’t forget that little greeting that Sunday morning.

Little did we know that that endearing term “my blogger” would be literal years later as I started blogging for Joey in Johnson’s Maui Ohana, and therefore was called "Joey's blogger".

Joey was my encourager on blogging when I was just starting to blog. During his Maui visit, he and my husband were talking about his blog (Rachel’s too) and my husband told him that I am blogging too. He said "I know. Your wife's blog is good". At that time, my husband was so unsure about my blogging. But Joey's words gave him an assurance that I am doing something good.

The interesting thing is that if Joey is alive today, I don’t think you would see me and Joey hanging out together as friends (we would be friends, but not "buddies). No, we wouldn't be "buddies" but there would always be a friendship connection somehow. However, it seems like God had really connected the two of us on the few years and months before he passed away because God has a mission for me – and that is to encourage his mama and papa and all who loves Joey – and that would be achieved through the blog. There were several more instances before his passing that confirmed my “calling”. I had some some of those on my post here.

On the side note, my blogging for the Johnsons is also a good example of “sowing and reaping”. Karen, Joey’s mama, was among the first faithful reader of my blog. She would occasionally leave comments to let me know she’s reading it regularly. Karen sow love, she’s reaping love in return. I have faithfully blogged for them because I love them, and because I know God loves them so much that He wants me to “walk with them” in this time of grief.

And so that’s my story.

Stay tuned – tomorrow I will post something special. Tomorrow you will read about “CUY”- and you would not want to miss that one!

In My Father's House ...

2008-08-20T02:34:00.001-07:00

Do not let your hearts be troubled.
Trust in God; trust also in me.
In my Father's house are many rooms;
if it were not so, I would have told you.
I am going there to prepare a place for you.
And if I go and prepare a place for you,
will come back and take you
to be with me that you also may be where I am.
(Jesus speaking)
John 14:1-4

Karaoke Singing on Joey's Birthday ... (ok, it's a sing along :)

2008-08-17T01:59:00.001-07:00

Did someone mention Karaoke? I don't think JJ ever passed up a chance to sing Karaoke...birthday or otherwise. He would always indulge me with a song - usually the "Mama's and the Papa's" duet. I wished I knew how to use the video on Facebook - I would sing a karaoke song for Joey on this birthday. We love you Joey. As you are singing praises to the King of Kings - send a little song our way on this special day. We miss you. Love Auntie Viv (this post is taken from Facebook Remembering Joey)

Here's one for Auntie Viv:

Here's one for Joey's Mama:

Here's one for Joey's Papa:

Here's one for JoAnne

Here's one for Jaime:

Here's one for Joey's Cuy

Here's for You Joey - Happy Birthday!

Beautiful Boy

2008-08-17T01:30:00.000-07:00

I was planning to learn how to post in this blog the slide show of JJ's Life that Rachel created, but I did not make it in time for Joey's b-day. so I encourage you to go to FACEBOOK and view it there. Click here for the link. You'll have to be a member of Facebook to view it.

Joe is leading the worship today at Hope Chapel - what a great way to celebrate Joey's birthday. I'd blog about it tonight :)

Three Tattooes Remembering Joey

2008-08-16T03:03:00.000-07:00

Advance Happy Birthday Joey

2008-08-15T17:41:00.001-07:00

Can a mother forget her nursing child?
Can she feel no love for the child she has borne?
But even if that were possible, I would not forget you!

See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands. . .

-Isaiah 49:15-16

OK, it may not be the palm of Karen's hands, but Joey's name is now permanently tattooed in the forearm of Karen. She did this in honor and remembrance of Joey's 29th birthday (on August 17th)

The beautiful thing is, even if Karen forgets Joey (which we all know will NEVER HAPPEN), God will never forget us. What a great comfort and encouragement that is! I can just imagine my name tattooed in my Father's palm, God' palm no less.

Happy Birthday Joey - I am sure you're smiling at your mama's tat :)

Birthday on Maui 2007

2008-08-15T08:16:00.000-07:00

God Bless Joey and Have A Safe Trip Home (Posted by Jay Moore at Facebook )

2008-08-14T20:17:00.000-07:00

I'll always remember the last time I saw Joey. It was this past Mother's Day, a Sunday and I was working security for TSA at the Kahului Airport. Joey was headed back to the mainland and was in line as he approached me from the side to have his ID and airline boarding pass checked. I didn't see him at first but recognized his voice as he said I wasn't going to bust him was I? We both laughed. He had his usual big smile on his face and was very happy that he could spend some time on Maui again with family and friends. The very last words I ever spoke to him are forever etched in me. "Joey, God bless and have a safe trip home." He did.

Birthday on Earth in 4 Days - I Wonder How They Celebrate In Heaven ... Or Do They ? ...

2008-08-13T00:23:00.000-07:00

This photo was taken at Joey's birthday party last year at Jaime and Drew's home. More posts on Joey's birthday coming up. Just want to remind everyone to keep the Johnson's in prayers. August 17 will be a hard day - pray for peace and comfort, and yes, pray for pockets of joy as they remember and celebrate Joey's wonderful life on earth.

======
* For insightful post on "a season of mourning", click here to go to Pastor Greg Laurie's blog. Some of you may not know, Pastor Greg Laurie's family are also mourning the recent sudden death of their son Christopher. It's a day by day, moment by moment journey....

Psalm 25

2008-08-12T01:34:00.000-07:00

1To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul;

2 in you I trust, O my God.
Do not let me be put to shame,
nor let my enemies triumph over me.

3 No one whose hope is in you
will ever be put to shame,
but they will be put to shame
who are treacherous without excuse.

4 Show me your ways, O LORD,
teach me your paths;

5 guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.

6 Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love,
for they are from of old.

7 Remember not the sins of my youth
and my rebellious ways;
according to your love remember me,
for you are good, O LORD.

8 Good and upright is the LORD;
therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.

9 He guides the humble in what is right
and teaches them his way.

10 All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful
for those who keep the demands of his covenant.

11 For the sake of your name, O LORD,
forgive my iniquity, though it is great.

12 Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD ?
He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.

13 He will spend his days in prosperity,
and his descendants will inherit the land.

14 The LORD confides in those who fear him;
he makes his covenant known to them.

15 My eyes are ever on the LORD,
for only he will release my feet from the snare.

16 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.

17 The troubles of my heart have multiplied;
free me from my anguish.

18 Look upon my affliction and my distress
and take away all my sins.

19 See how my enemies have increased
and how fiercely they hate me!

20 Guard my life and rescue me;
let me not be put to shame,
for I take refuge in you.

21 May integrity and uprightness protect me,
because my hope is in you.

Joey At Keanae

2008-08-11T02:24:00.000-07:00

We just got back from a relaxing weekend at Keanaea. Thank you Uncle Bill an Auntie Lu (the Keplers) for your generosity in sharing your precious Keanaea home with us. Joey also has a lot of wonderful memories there. While there, I spent some time reading his journal entries and took a shot of one of them:

I know he has many photos to go along with the many journal entries and memories. We will add more later. Here's a sample of some of them:

Joey's Life (by Kelly Bonsell)

2008-08-08T02:42:00.000-07:00

Karen and Joe
We mourn with you over the loss of Joey—

Your baby boy,
Your precious, baby boy.
We can’t take away the pain.
I wish we could.

We can only help you remember...
Joey’s life.
And oh how he LIVED
His life!

Joe, you said that’s the one thing
you can control -
to keep your memories...
Joey’s stories,
Alive.

You are homesick.
Yes, very, very homesick.
But your time here is not yet over.

We pray
You will find a special sense of solace
In this “foreign”, yet sweet, land.
And that those who love you,
Those who love Joey,
Will help you mourn
And live.

We continue to remember,
To reflect with you on...
Joey’s life.

Until we see him again,
Until you see him again,
In Heaven.

What a joyous,
First moment of eternity that will be!

***

* This was originally posted on comment section at this post (Homesick)

** The photo above is taken by Rachel . She's Joey's CUY. Thank you Rachel for all the beautiful photos of Joey that you are sharing with us.

*** Rachel is hosting a "birthday remembrance" for Joey at FACEBOOK. Click here if you'd like to join - everyone is invited. More info on this to follow.

Psalm 23

2008-08-06T07:35:00.001-07:00

The Lord Is My Shepherd

The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
He leadeth me beside the still waters
He restoreth my soul.

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness
for his name's sake

Yea, though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil:
for thou art with me;
thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me
in the presence of mine enemes;
thou annointest my headwith oil;
my cup runneth over

Surely goodness and mercy
shall follow me all the days of my life.
and I will dwell in the house of The Lord forever.

***

Joey Johnson (by Bradley )

2008-08-05T08:58:00.000-07:00

Joey was a great kid… a great guy. But how do I relate this in a short period of time? What story is the quintessential one that will relate this? I have been praying about this and asking advice from my PK Bros about the opportunity to share and wanted to “do it right”

This is hard because Joey was the sum of many things that made him Joey.

He was a risk taker, as Bill has talked about. This was epitomized by the amazing 80 to 85 foot leap off the cliff at Ki’pahulu. (What is equally as amazing is the Karen watched him do it.) But he never made fun of you if you chose to hang back, and not take “the leap”.

He was very intelligent & smart. Two separate qualities that are not often found in the same person. But he didn’t take advantage of you if you weren’t in the same league as him… accept on the poker table or the Fantasy Football League. He would proudly take my cash whenever we played.

He had a rye sense of humor. This coupled with being intelligent & smart made him a very funny guy. He had the ability to point out the subtle obscurely funny things in life – and did it frequently. Times playing Balderdash at Keanae will live in infamy – Joey was the supreme player! Or if you read his and Rachael’s blog you can see this. But I never saw him make fun of someone at their expense – never being mean spirited.

He was passionate about his beliefs. He would debate those ideals that he felt strongly about. Things like Trojan Football, FF scoring, politics, and God were topics that we discussed. But he’d never go so far as to sacrifice the relationship to be “right.”

He had charisma. He was his father’s son… but he didn’t use it to manipulate.

Joey wasn’t perfect, no one is… but he asked for forgiveness when he needed to (a tribute to his up bringing) and one of the most difficult qualities to posses he had the ability to forgive. There was a time in our relationship that I had deeply offended him, and he forgave me. I believe that forgiveness is the most precious of all gifts that one can give. I am blessed that Joey gave that to me.

Bradley

Circle Of Love

2008-08-04T08:22:00.001-07:00

Note from the blogger: this post is a work in progress... new photos and sharing will be added here until Joey's birthday so check back. Thanks.

***

During the Memorial Service for Joey at Hope Chapel, Kathy Englert talked about the "Circle of Love" in Joey's life. If we look at the picture of her on the left, you will notice that she's holding a paper plate. That's where she wrote her notes for that sharing. She said it reminds her of the many circles of love that Joey has in his life here on earth.

When Joey was born, he was surrounded by people who loves Karen and Joe. They all fell in love with Joey the first time he came out of Karen's womb (actually even before that). It's a circle of love so special. Maybe someday we can watch together that DVD that Kay and Roger send the Johnsons. I believe that's the circle of love in Joey's infant and childhood days.

As Joey grew up, aside from the circle of love within his family, he's always blessed with the circle of love of friends. There's Kevin, his best friend. There's Kevin's family - all of them are like family to Joey.

When they moved to Maui, he once again had circle of love through the Hope Chapel family. There's the Youth Group where he formed many friendships. Also, at Baldwin High School - he's surrounded with friends who loved him.

Move to CA for college and once again circled by friends there (I will elaborate on this later).

After college, he became "an adult" :) - had to work for a living and even there there's a circle of love which surrounds him (will elaborate more later too).

When we got the news about Joey's passing, a circle of love came rushing to Joe and Karen's house; and we know that a circle of love were at LA the same time. Melissa was there with Joey and all their friends. Rachel was there with him.

I will come back and add more to this post and will add some photos. Feel free to leave a comment even if this post is half done :)

Dear Johnsons family - we are thinking of you today. Joey's birthday is coming soon and we know that is going to be a hard and difficult day for you. We're here to wrap our arms around you and once again surround you with that circle of love that you and Joey always have...

The Lord Gives, The Lord Takes Away, Blessed Be The Name Of The Lord

2008-08-03T19:00:00.000-07:00

The following "thoughts and message" was posted at the comment section when we first started this blog. I was reviewing the posts and comments tonight and this one stood out. Maybe this bring comfort today as it brought comfort that day it was posted. And I know that the encouragement which this post brings about will last and carry us through...

Only a few weeks ago Kay and I were enjoying a mini Bible Study reunion dinner at the Englert home; McMahons, Pattersons, Englerts, Whites and Johnsons, bantering about Study stories from 30 years ago. I sat across from Karen and Joe, who sat facing the wall so that Kay and I could enjoy a marvelous Maui sunset. Even in shadow their faces glowed. An unmistakable walk of joy and peace with the Lord: loving, selfless and sacrificial servants of His. Their capacity for reflecting Christ is amazing, both seen and unseen.

Discussions then centered on stories of the children. When Karen and Joe filled us in on Joey, my mind took me back so many years ago when the Johnsons lived nearby and we were able to enjoy seeing Joanne, Jamie and Joey grow.

Upon returning to California, I was prodded by the Lord to watch our old movies converted to video of those Bible Study years. There they were. Movie clips of Joey’s birth at the Berman’s birthing center. I haven’t watched our movies of the 70’s since they were converted more than 10 years ago. Well that’s easy to burn to a DVD for our friends. So a variety of clips from 1975 through 1979 filled up a DVD and off went copies to the “sunset dinner” families.

There was no way for me to know there was a heavenly purpose in that duty fulfilled. Karen and Joe sent a heartfelt thanks to me that the DVD was going to be so much fun to view with Joey when he returned to Maui for Joanne’s graduation and the Johnson family reunion. Karen reported that Joey saw the old sound movies of friends and family cheering his birth. Then the news. Tears. Heartache. More tears.

Why Joey? Why now? Why the Johnson’s?

Children are His, that in His love he grants us some days with them in our arms, loaning them to us that we might enjoy His gifts, learn about being parents and come to understand Him more wholly as our Father. His message is clear: His love is not to be confused with what we expect, or how we might grieve for what we could have had. It is ours. It is unconditional. And it is complete.

Now we weep and celebrate. We surrender to the pain of this loss. We love Christ back for Joey’s place in our hearts and his life on Earth. And love Him also for the assurance of Joey’s new home in paradise.

May God and His faithful carry you gently through this time, dear Johnson family.

We love you,
Roger and Kay White
Auburn, CA

Baby Steps to A "New Normal" ...

2008-08-03T01:23:00.000-07:00

* this photo was taken at Josh & Heidi's Maui Reception

Today we attended Josh and Heidi Spencer's Maui Reception. To those who do not know, Josh is close friend of Joey. He was supposed to be one of the groomsmen in Josh and Heidi's wedding. Joey and Josh were roommates for a long time. It was through Josh (somewhat through Josh) that Rachel and Joey met. Josh and Joey are very dear to Bradley and me - they were good friends with Bradley especially back when they were "teenagers" :)

Today Joe and Karen attended Josh and Heidi's Maui Reception. I thought their family and friends in the mainland will be glad to read this. Remember this post when we prayed for their "re-entry"?. They are being answered in a gentle way. This reception is one of the "safest" gathering or event I can think of for Karen and Joe to go to on their journey to the "new normal". All (or almost all) of us there are close with them - familiar faces, close friends, a safe group. They came with Aiden, their grandson. They stayed for a little while. It was so nice to see them there and I know Josh and Heidi felt love and honored that they came.

I am guessing Joe and Karen will be at church tomorrow...

P.S. We missed you there Joey...

Filter Magazine Remembers Joe

2008-08-01T23:46:00.000-07:00

Filter magazine honored Joe(y) with an article on their website. I heard it's also on this months' printed issue of the magazine (I'll have to double check that...). Here's an excerpt from the Filter Website:

The Filter family is very saddened to have recently lost one of our own, our dear friend Joseph Johnson.

Joe was a great friend, a creative soul, a genius marketing mind, an inspiring workmate, a wise and generous spirit, a seasoned traveller, a ukelele phenom and the life of many a party.

Continue reading this post, including comments at Filter Magazine. Click here...

Brother and Sisters

2008-08-01T08:41:00.000-07:00

There is a void that will never be filled
an emptiness that will never be replaced
a gap that will never be fixed
sadness that will refuse to be comforted
because a brother is missed.

In times sadness
when missing Joey surface,
remember Betsy ten Boom's words
to her sister Corrie:

"There is no pit too deep
that God isn't deeper still"*

***
* quote from "Hiding Place" by Corrie Ten Boom.

Remembering Joey - by Ray

2008-07-31T02:18:00.000-07:00

* see comment section for an explanation of who Ray is :)

I ended up with Joeys IPOD while I was in Iraq this spring. While I was there my IPOD, with all my favorite music, broke...yes I tried all the button pushing tricks, but it was fried. I was forced to listen to JJ's IPOD and all these bands and songs I had never/barely even heard of before from JJ's "LA" music catalog...like..Cat Power...the Pixies...Red 5 etc. I started to really like all these bands that, at first, I thought were going to suck...and that I was going to be stuck with for weeks, but I actually really like them now. This is so trivial, but I associate all that music I listened to now with Joey. music was such a big part of who he was...I feel like its a really good way...maybe the best way, to connect with the person I knew him to be.

Since Joey died, the things that have become more prevalent or more in the forefront of my mind is how important people are. It sounds obvious,..but what actually matters..at the end of the day is friends and family and God... making the time together matter. I can't really talk much on that because of all the time I spend away from home in the military, but whatever time we do have...make it count.

We all would love to have another Christmas or summer with Joey, but its not going to happen any time soon unfortunately. What we can do though...what I am going to do is take full advantage of the time we have with each other....with our spouses, kids, loved ones, neighbors and friends.....This life is sooo short. I really want to make it count. losing Joey has really illustrated the importance of that.

Also, It seems like I am noticing all my flaws more than ever....like they are being highlighted so I don't overlook them. I feel like I need to be more generous for some reason? I have been putting more money in those donation boxes at the store , the ones with the sick kids on the front.

I've also been tipping more than normal at restaurants. I don't care as much about money, and making it, as I did before. It seems like a better idea to invest in time with God and the people we care for. Its the times and experiences we have together that are going to matter in the end. Everything else is trivial.

We will miss you Joey, for the rest of our lives here. We Love You.

RAY-

New Specific Prayers ...

2008-07-30T02:20:00.000-07:00

As we continue to pray for the Johnsons, I thought of adding some new specific prayers to what was already written on the previous post. Here are some that I can think of:

1) Pray for their re-entry to Maui. They had a good time with JoAnne and her family in Virginia, as well in LA with Joe's family. They were all together as they grieve. Now that they are back on Maui, a new wave of grief will surface - please continue to pray for comfort and encouragement.

2) Pray for their re-entry to work. I am not sure when (I think Joe will be going back soon), but when they do, it would be very very difficult, it will be tough. Pray for clarity of mind. Also for understanding and compassion with and from their co-workers and clients.

3) Pray for their re-entry to church, fellowship with others and ministry. Even this will be difficult as they try to blend back and live a "new normal". Pray for us as well, that we will be compassionate and understanding as well as sensitive and caring in this very emotional year. Pray that we'd have the wisdom to know how to best offer sympathy; and that we will be comfortable surrounding them with love, not being afraid to mention Joey's name in conversations.

Please add in the comment section any other specific prayers you may think of. Thank you....

What Do You See In Your Clouds?

2008-07-29T01:36:00.001-07:00

“Behold, He cometh with clouds.”
Revelation 1:7

In the Bible clouds are always connected with God. Clouds are those sorrows or sufferings or providences, within or without our personal lives, which seem to dispute the rule of God. It is by those very clouds that the Spirit of God is teaching us how to walk by faith. If there were no clouds, we should have no faith. "The clouds are but the dust of our Father's feet." The clouds are a sign that He is there. What a revelation it is to know that sorrow and bereavement and suffering are the clouds that come along with God! God cannot come near without clouds, He does not come in clear shining.
It is not true to say that God wants to teach us something in our trials: through every cloud He brings, He wants us to unlearn something. His purpose in the cloud is to simplify our belief until our relationship to Him is exactly that of a child - God and my own soul, other people are shadows. Until other people become shadows, clouds and darkness will be mine every now and again. Is the relationship between myself and God getting simpler than ever it has been?
There is a connection between the strange providences of God and what we know of Him, and we have to learn to interpret the mysteries of life in the light of our knowledge of God. Unless we can look the darkest, blackest fact full in the face without damaging God's character, we do not yet know Him.
"They feared as they entered the cloud . . ." - Is there anyone "save Jesus only" in your cloud? If so, it will get darker; you must get to the place where there is "no one any more save Jesus only."

***

The devotion above is from "MY UTMOST FOR HIS HIGHEST" written by Oswald Chambers. This is the devotion for July 29 on that book. The post was taken from the website HEARTLIGHT.

Thank You From the Johnsons

2008-07-28T18:28:00.000-07:00

Dear Everyone,

This is Joe's brother Steve. Joe would like me to let all of you know how grateful he and Karen are for your prayers and thoughts during this "second wave" of losing our mother. They have been staying at our home in Redlands since Friday, and we as a family were able to lift mom up in her last days and honor her. She passed into eternal life at 12:30 AM PST on Monday,7-28.

Joe and Karen were the last to be by her side as of about 9:00 PM the previous evening. We 4 kids, (Viv, Joe,Glen, and myself), were able to be with her in her last few days, singing and praying by her bedside, reading her scripture, and just being quietly supportive.We were also thrilled to be able to spend precious time with each other,as we all continued to walk our road of mourning for young Joey, only alongside them for a while. And when mom was ready to meet the Lord, we have no doubt that JJ and G JOHN were right there to welcome her in!

I was sitting with Joe this morning, and we were talking about how Joey had such a wonderful bond with Gramma John, and always looked forward to sitting with her and sharing about his life. Well, we feel he is still doing that in this new life they all share together. Joe wants to especially thank the prayer circle at Hope, who were actually in prayer when mom passed. That is such a comforting thought for them.

I will be taking them to LAX in an hour or so for their return to Maui, And I am sure they will be in good hands.

JoAnne and Jamie, Thank you so much for your constant love you show your parents. They have raised you to have the same wonderful qualities that make them such special human beings. I know Gramma loved you both very, very, much.

To all the other Grandkids, Great Grandkids,relatives and friends who have continued to show their love, thank you, thank you, thank you!! This is not a step back, rather it is a step forward, as we commit our mother to the Lord, and prepare for the next chapter in this ever unfolding story called life.

I don't know many of you (personally), but I say on behalf of Viv, Glen, and myself, thank you for supporting our precious brother and sister, and for being such a wonderful "family".

It is well with our souls.
Steve